Annoyed

The reason grumpy old men are so grumpy is they don’t like to be annoyed. What annoys them? Everything!

You say, "good morning" to a grumpy old man and he just might go off on you with a tirade of why it is not a good morning. By the time he is finished, he will have you convinced that it is not a good morning. Or it won’t be a good morning because you said it to the wrong man.

There are many physical annoyances. Ears. God must have a tremendous sense of humor, because as a man gets old, his ears grow. Mine look like I have satellite dishes strapped to both sides of my head. Then there’s the hair in your ears. You have to constantly trim the hair or if you’re going bald you just comb it with the rest of your comb over.

And, with the size of your ears, you’d think you could hear better. Not so. A couple of weeks ago I helped a fellow grumpy old man by installing a ceiling fan. When I asked, "do you have any electrical tape?" He said, "sure I have a pair of vice-grips."

Eyebrows are annoying. If you don’t use a weed wacker on them constantly, you start to look like Andy Rooney. No body should look like that.

Grumpy old men are annoyed because they still want to see themselves in the mirror as that handsome young man they still think they are. We are not going to talk about the stomach or the butt. How does a butt shrink and a belly expand. A little stimulus money on researching that would be well spent.

Then there’s nose hair. As unpleasant as it is, here’s another thing to annoy. I might advise you to invest in what ever company manufacturers nose and ear trimmers. With all the baby boomers we have now, there is a huge market potential.

Next is eyesight. They can’t see. An old man sitting on a bench in the shopping mall, waiting for his wife to get back, spies a teenager. She is scantily clad, with red and yellow hair and arms, face and other parts covered in tattoos. When she becomes aware that the old man is staring at her, she walks over and says, "hey old man, are you staring at me?" He looks up above his glasses and replies, "I was trying to, but you won’t hold still long enough for me to get these trifocals focused.

Grumpy old men are really annoyed because they can’t do what they used to do. That covers a lot of things. Not just what you’re thinking about.

For example, a storm comes through and does some minor damage to the roof. Because the wife has told the grumpy old man not to even think about going upon the roof, he calls a roofing company for an estimate. When he sees how much they want to fix it, he comes up with a plan. He will wait until she is gone and he will fix that roof - a whole lot cheaper.

As soon as the wife leaves on another shopping trip, which is what wives do, he goes out to the shed and gets out the ladder. Next he gathers up some tools and materials to repair the roof. But, by the time he has the ladder leaned up against the house and carried out all the supplies, he is ready for a rest. Next thing he knows, she is back home asking about the ladder, tools, and materials.

If you see a house with a ladder leaned up against it, a grumpy old man lives there. He’s going to fix the roof - someday.

Whomever said that men die before women because they want to, was correct. Female logic drives grumpy old men crazy. When my wife does the annual ‘house cleaning’ she follows a simple plan. If it’s mine, she throws it away and keeps what’s hers.

I had a favorite shirt. Used to wear it every weekend. It was my outside shirt. You know, the one that is comfortable and you don’t mind getting it dirty. One day as I went to the closet to get the shirt, it wasn’t there. I guessed that it hadn’t made it to the laundry, so I put on another shirt. When I went into the garage to the rag box, I found my shirt in the ‘rag’ box. What else could I do, I took it back and put it into the laundry bin. That was the last time I ever saw that shirt.

Grumpy old men do not like to be annoyed! And it seems there are millions of people dedicated to annoying them.

Grumpy old men get annoyed by anyone that has a problem with the phrase, "one Nation under God." They hate to hear, ‘happy holidays’ or ‘winter festival’ instead of Merry Christmas. It really irks them for someone not to bow their head when someone prays. And, it infuriates them anytime someone doesn’t stand and place their hand over their heart when the National Anthem is played or the Flag goes by.

Now that you know. Don’t annoy a grumpy old man. They may bite.  Even if they have to put their teeth in.

PMO
©2010

Big Brother

Smile, you’re on camera. There are so many technologies today that privacy is almost non-existent. I read in the daily wipe today that Dallas is testing a license plate recognition system. The way it works is a vehicle equipped with a special camera drives around recording pictures of license plates. The accompanying software matches any plates that have outstanding traffic tickets or other such infractions of the law.

The administrating company responsible assures that those plates that are not in violation are discarded. Do we really want anyone to know where we park our car, and when and for how long?

I have a friend in government that informs me that in most cases a cell phone can be traced to less than ten feet. Kinda scary.

Police have cameras that can detect people inside a structure. And, every time you log onto the internet, you are identified by an internet protocol address.

Devices that track your buying habits are used in many stores. Company surveys seek to "offer better service" are common place. They say they want to "personalize" your wants and needs so they can provide the products and services.

Could George Owell have been correct, just a few years off on the time line? We do live under constant surveillance, wether you know it or not.

And, remember, just because you are not paranoid, they still are out to get you.

PMO
©2010

Health Care Cost

It’s not surprising that the government health care plan is out of the news. The tried and proven method of government doing to us what they want is as simple as wait and they will go away.

But, I had an experience last week that put health care cost up close and personal. I had to rush my wife to the emergency room for severe chest pain. As it turned out, after numerous test, she did not have a heart problem. She has to go to another doctor to find out what the real problem is.

Today, I got the bill from the hospital. Is it possible to have testing that cost nearly $10,000 to find out what was not the problem? Talk about health care cost!

Oh, the people were very nice and they did a good job. Why, one of them even went and got me a chair as I was standing out in the hallway next to the gurney where she waited for several hours.

If I had know then what the bill was going to be, I would have taken that chair home with me.

PMO
©2010

Taking Names

Okay already, everybody is demanding something. Let’s see what’s on the list: share the wealth, if you have any money, it’s mine; illegal immigrants have rights to break our laws and want more rights to break more laws; nurses in California want wall street taxed so they can have a more just economy; gays and lesbians want rights to defy the laws of nature and to be a protected class because of it; and the list goes on and on and on.

I doubt there is a day that goes by that there is not some group protesting for wants in this country. Even I have thought about organizing a protest to protest the protests. Why not, who is going to find out who I am? As long as I am anonymous, I have no fear.

What would happen if suddenly names, faces and addresses appeared on TV, the internet and newspapers? We have the technology. How much support would all the causes have if participants knew they were going to be recognized by family, neighbors and others? Sure mob mentality takes over in an emotional event, but with the knowledge that everyone will know who you are sinks in, would there be hesitation?

I have seen numerous news reports about the "bad" person or company that is the target. But, I don’t recall ever seeing the one doing the protest.

You and I might be surprised at the people in our lives that would show up supporting something that is absolutely ridiculous by any standard of sanity.

If the plan worked, then we could go inside private lives further and reveal all those deep dark secrets that most people would never want revealed.

Or, we could subscribe to a few tweets or sign up for Facebook. It’s already there.

PMO
©2010

Right or Wrong

Is it wrong to kill another human being? Let me rephrase the question. Is it wrong to murder another human being? The answer is an emphatic yes. But the answer to the original question may very well be an emphatic no.

If another person is attempting to kill you or a member of your family or a friend or just someone that you happen to see on the street, the answer changes. I have always thought that the second worst thing I could do in life would be to kill someone. The first worst thing would be for them to kill me.

If my neighbor has a new boat, is it wrong for me not to have one? What about if my neighbor works five or more days per week to provide for the family and I don’t, is that wrong? Now, what if I am hungry and have no means to feed myself and my neighbor is not willing to help, is that wrong? Here’s where it gets complicated. If my neighbor, against his will is forced to feed me, then why shouldn’t I get a new boat too?

If half of the country pays no taxes, then half pay all the taxes. This leads me to think that I support someone that I don’t even know. I need to find out who that person is.

I want to know if they have a boat. I don’t.

PMO
©2010

Eighteen

A common phrase among old people is, "boy, I’d like to be eighteen again and know what I know now." Which presents another one of my never ending questions, "would you really?"

If you were magically transformed to way - way - back then, how would it be different. Oh, you would know a lot more about sex, but then you’d also know sex isn’t what makes the world go around. OK, it did at eighteen. But you would know what the consequences are and you would know you can’t build a life on it.

You would know that sooner or later, you would have to get a job and work everyday. That’s a terrible truth to have to deal with at that age. And, you would know that being treated fairly isn’t always or maybe never going to happen.

How much fun would you have if you knew, the ones you love the most would hurt you more than you could have ever imagined at eighteen. Could you ever love and trust?

Eighteen is for fun, and there would be no fun if you knew what you know now. How many of the same mistakes you’ve made be repeated even though you know what the outcome would be?

Nope, not me. I don’t want to do it over because I would probably make a bigger mess than I did then. I like being old and grumpy. You get away with a lot of things you couldn’t have gotten away with at eighteen and some of the scars are starting to heal.

PMO
©2010

Blogs

Ever wonder how many blogs there are? Me neither. I do know there are blogs about everything and blogs about nothing - like maybe this one. This blog is about something, but you have to keep up to find out what it’s about.

Almost everyday I read a number of blogs - just the stuff that interest me. I really don’t care about the benefits of worshiping cabbage plants or how to grow cotton in your bathtub for fun and profit. The one common thread I notice is that people are not happy. I’m a grumpy old man so I am not supposed to be happy.

The conservatives are not happy, but neither are the liberals. Everybody is offended by somebody. I know I am offended by people that are offended by me - which may just about everybody. I don’t care.

Where is this going? It has occurred to me that if all these people are unhappy, is that the preferred way of life. When you get to be a grumpy old man, it is the only way of life. Do people really enjoy being miserable? I know from reading they enjoy sharing their unhappiness with others and can’t understand why the others are not on board with their particular unhappy.

I am starting to truly believe that if God had wanted us to have the internet, we would have all been born with a USB port. Maybe then we could start being angry, upset, ticked off and generally miserable from birth.

From a grumpy old man point of view, I’m glad there are so many grouchy people. It makes me seem more normal.

PMO
©2010

The Secret

I have known several millionaires in my lifetime. I’m talking about people with enough money to burn a wet horse - a Texas phrase for a whole bunch. The one thing that millionaires seem to have in common is not how much money they earn. It’s about how much money they spend.

In one of my previous lives - different jobs - I worked for a man that had millions, when millions were worth a lot more than they are today. One day I got a seven page letter from him chewing me out for a seven dollar expenditure. Understand, this was in ancient times so this man had taken the time and dictated the letter to his private secretary. When I read the letter, I was furious. Then I thought about what he had to say.

He explained to me that it meant nothing to spend $7.00 in the grand scheme. But, how many $7.00 do you spend? The letter went on to point out there is no thought given to such a trivial amount and therefore it is the most dangerous money spent. In little or no time, small amounts like this amount to hundreds, then thousands and even more over a period of time.

In my job, I had to submit monthly reports on income and expenses. The next month I spent thousands on one item. He sent me a note praising me for the fine judgement I had used in making the purchase. Because, I had taken time, done my research, carefully weighed my options and made the best deal on the item.

I wonder just how much money individuals and government could save if they refused to make the small expenditures made every day?

I know in my wife’s case, it could be thousands - maybe billions. That’s probably why I am not a millionaire.

PMO
©2010

Chili

I like chili. Furthermore, I make perhaps the world’s best chili. At least I think so. The question is, why can’t you make chili in the hot, hot summertime?

My family insists that you don’t make chili in the summer, because it is too hot. Why not? Restaurants have chili in the summer and people buy it - especially Mexican food restaurants. In Texas, where it is hot, people eat Mexican food year round. If they didn’t, the Mexican food cooks would be out of a job and the establishments would be out of business.

But, at my house, I am not allowed to make chili until there is a blue norther - a Texas term defining the change of seasons. Around here, we have two seasons - summer and winter - and they are unpredictable. The weather just switches between them when it wants to.

When I look at things logically, I get into trouble. Think about it. We eat pizza in the summer. That’s a ‘hot’ food. Then, there’s barbeque with lots of sauce that is hot. Buffalo wings are hot, but we eat them. How about all those hot sauces sold at stores? Do they quit selling in the summer? NO!

Why am I telling you this? Because out there somewhere is somebody cooking chili and I want you to stop. It’s too hot.

PMO
©2010

What Is Wrong With This Picture?

An optometrist in Germantown, Tennessee received a notice that flying an American flag outside her office is a violation of the complex’s bylaws.

Last May, in California, students were forced to remove American flag T-shirts on Cinco de Mayo because school administrators said any display of the flag was incendiary and disrespectful on the holiday of a foreign country. On American soil?

Recently Vice President Joe Biden said conservative Americans were acting like terrorists. Apparently the Department of Homeland Security agrees because they have told citizens to report odd behavior of Americans.

Last month Americans witnessed the TSA detain and strip a 95 year-old leukemia patient of her adult diaper.

To crack down on "bad parenting" and the evil food industry, the Obama administration has given the Federal Trade Commission, Centers for Disease Control and Prevention, Food and Drug Administration and the U.S. Department of Agriculture the task of imposing new restrictions on restaurants and food manufacturers. The Administration claims that the war on food is to combat childhood obesity. Many of the foods targeted are those considered healthy foods - oatmeal, nuts, yogurt, wheat bread and milk to name a few.

Where is all this headed?  Here is a simple explanation.

In an old movie, a rescue team is dispatched to save some people lost in an avalanche. The rescue is so risky, that on the flight to get to the scene, one of the characters is sitting in all his gear when he starts to twist and contort his body. When asked, "what are you doing?" He replied, "I’m trying to kiss my ass goodbye."

Again, Pogo is right. "We have seen the enemy and they is us."

PMO
©2010

Different Cultures

My wife went to a Hindu wedding. She says it is nothing like a Baptist wedding. The guest sit and chat while what ever is going on, goes on. Then there is applause when the ring is placed on the bride’s finger.

Isn’t it strange how cultures are different, but people are the same? They get married seeking the same happy future, no matter what their beliefs are. Yes, even red necks. That’s a culture I know a little about.

If people have the same hopes, dreams, and desires, why do they not get along. Wouldn’t it be a lot easier, and make more sense, just to sit back let each other live their lives? But they don’t. Races hate each other, religions hate each other, and well, red necks just don’t understand why everybody doesn’t do things the way they do.

Cultures appear to be the problem - not the people. I have know many people of different cultures and when dealing with them one on one, they just seem like people. However, issues arise when cultures collied.

The solution to mankind’s hostilities is to develop one culture - red neck culture. Red necks eat anything and I do mean anything. They sing, dance, and cry, and this may be emotion over a rack of pork ribs. They don’t try to figure out what’s in somebody’s head. That’s because their head hurts from the twelve pack they had with the ribs. And, red necks understand that duct tape and WD-40 can fix anything. It’s a simple culture. It takes no effort to adapt this culture.

Try it. You’ll like it. World problems solved.

PMO
©2010

Helpless

What does it feel like to be totally helpless? We all have seen disabled people that are locked in bodies that don’t function. We’ve seen animals mistreated or killed. Think about babies, aren’t they totally helpless? Old people are often helpless and have to be fed and cared for.

But, what if you were young, strong, fit and full of life? Would you feel helpless? Ask the people in London. Recently we saw on the Telly as they say, what helpless looks like for ordinary everyday people. Helpless to fend off attack or defend one’s property or business.

Most people never stop and truly think about such things. They never happen in my city or at least in my neighborhood.

London is just an example of what happens and has happened through out history when people are defenseless or when they have given up and expect the police to protect them. Folks, there are not enough police in the world to protect you every minute of every day.

Helpless is when circumstances prevent you from helping yourself or loved ones and there is no help available. It can’t happen in the USA, right?  The question is, has it already begun?

PMO
©2010

Fleas

Every day I try to share with you what I think about something. The problem is that I think too much and that just confuses me. I usually address subjects over my head, which is almost anything, but that doesn’t keep me from thinking about them.

Today, I thought I’d share a bit of culture. One of my favorite poems by Ogden Nash.

Fleas

Adam
Had’em.

That’s poetry even I can understand.

PMO
©2010

Brain Age

I got an email from a friend that pointed me to a website for a test to determine my brain age. Silly me thought that my brain was as old as I am. But, I took the test.

There were flashing lights, flashing stars, match this with that and word games. The test revealed that my brain is about 25 years younger than I am. Now, I don’t know if that is a good thing or not.

According to the test, I can think about things I no longer can do. I already knew that.

PMO
©2010

Then and Now

A friend of mine sent me a print out on what some prices were on the day I discovered America.

Way back then, a loaf of bread cost nine cents. It’s about twenty times that today - at least where I shop. Gasoline was 21¢ per gallon. It’s only gone up about 1700%. Houses way back then would cost an average of $8,650.00 which surprised me. I bought a very nice house in the mid 70's for less than $10,000. Even in today’s market, you don’t get much for $150,000 anymore.

In the stone age, when I was born, stamps only cost 3¢ and the post office wasn’t going broke. My how things have changed.

The minimum wage was 30¢ per hour and the average income was $2,675 per year. You could get a car for $1,225. A good set of tires cost that today.

Are ready for this? The DOW as at 152. Today it’s up 7500% from that.

All this should mean something. I think way back then, people worked and felt responsible for their own welfare.

However, I did notice that eggs were 63¢ per dozen. It must have been the chickens that started all the trouble with our economy.

PMO
©2010

Job Performance?

Would you hire someone to do a job and never check on their job performance? How about if they kept coming to you wanting more money? What about if they took a lot more time than they should?

If you answered yes to the three questions above, then read no further. Anyone else reading forward should be honest and admit that 99.9% of the time, you don’t know what your representatives are doing, but you keep giving them more money.

My Congressman says that in the past two and half years the national debt has gone up $3.7 trillion . It took from 1776 to 1992 to accumulate the amount amassed in those two and half years. That means that in the twenty five or so years in between, government built up about $10 trillion more.

Let me check my numbers. It took 212 years for government to build a debt to just shy of $4 trillion, another twenty-five years to tack on roughly $10 trillion, but only thirty months to add almost another $4 trillion. It’s best to talk in round numbers when dealing with these amounts.

The job performance sucks. How about the results. We fought several wars which we won. Then we learned to fight wars and not win. We’ve sent people to outer space and built some roads. For all that money, we should have a paved road to the moon.

I talked to a friend of mine today that is an educated man. He has a doctorate degree. That makes him smart - at least sometimes. His opinion is that there are no honest politicians. They all go to D.C. to get rich and play powerful while they wait to retire with pension and benefits that would take a working man or woman’s breath away. Working people don’t even dream as wild as the benefits.

It seems to me that we need to fire a bunch of people and get some new ones that want to work. And, I don’t mean ones that tell a lovely story, but real people that are hired hands, not little gods.

Nah, it wouldn’t work.

PMO
©2010

National Idiot Day

I would like to propose that we have National Idiot Day. Now, before you try to get ahead of me and start talking about Congress and the White House, this would be another day.

We need a day when all the idiots in the country get on the road and drive. Everybody else stays home. Only true idiots wold be allowed on the streets.

Just imagine, watching TV while helicopters hovered and cameras rolled. Do digital cameras roll? Whatever. I would love watching them cutting each other off, changing from the extreme left lane to the far right lane in attempt to make a right hand turn, and then of course all that goes with road rage. There could be gun fights over who gets to tailgate whom. Wrong way drunken drives could really shine in all the action. If we want to save time, we could turn off all the traffic lights and remove the stop signs since idiots don’t stop for them anyway.

Talk about a boost in the economy! Wreckers and body shops would be busy for months. Funeral homes, ambulances, hospitals, long term care facilities, and certainly florist would be hopping.

I’d pay to watch it on pay TV. But, then I am sometimes crazy. Thank goodness though, I am not one of those idiots.

PMO
©2010

Internet

You want to know how old I am? I am old enough to remember when research on the internet was actually worth the effort. In the old days, searches usually resulted in information from one university library or another. Now days, the data you find is about as reliable as I would be, if you asked me to help move a piano.

I am so old that I rarely get a new joke. All the ones my friends send me, I have already seen.

Kinda sad isn’t it?

PMO
©2010

Brush Fires

Samuel Adams said, "It does not take a majority to prevail, but rather an irate, tireless minority, keen on setting brush fires of freedom in the minds of men. If ye love wealth better than liberty, the tranquility of servitude than the animating contest of freedom, go from us in peace. May your chains sit lightly upon you, and may posterity forget that ye were our countrymen!"

Remember Sam? He was John’s cousin. They and a bunch of other guys got tired of government messing in their lives so they founded a new country. There is much talk today of the people being tired of the Congress and the White House.

I am not a smart man, but then I am not stupid. I do have a couple of college degrees. Therefore, it is natural for me to comment on the performance of our governing powers. It is obvious that we have allowed ourselves to be governed by a bunch of people that couldn’t run a cash register at a convenience store - on the late night shift when things are slow.

Because I am an observer by nature and training, I see the brush fires starting to burn. It doesn’t matter what your political persuasion is, if you think everything is fine, it is not.

Just thought you might want to give some thought to it. Maybe not.

PMO
©2010

Government TV?

It’s time we take a different look at Congress and the White House. They have the real makings of a reality TV program. I have never seen such adolescent behavior on television. There’s the name calling, blaming each other and us, the citizens, while trying to boost their own power position. Remember, with power comes money. And, when you combine power and money there is usually corruption. Even better is those individuals that do it with a straight face. Talk about acting!

They attack the Tea Party. I suppose it’s because of all those tea bags they got in the mail. It seems to me that now the servants, that’s us, should send them pacifiers. I have seen the tantrums a baby has when it doesn’t get its way and Washington has perfected the art.

We could sell the rights to the government TV show to some network for an enormous fee and that should cut some on our taxes. Then there would be the revenue from the residuals when the shows go into reruns.

About the only thing that is going to be difficult is what to call the show. All the good names are gone - Big Brother, Survivor (us), Dumb and Dumber (my favorite) and of course, The Twilight Zone.

The sponsor products are obvious - hemorrhoidal creams, laxatives, beer (lots of beer commercials) and anything that sells for $19.95 plus shipping and handling.

Let me know what you think on a name. I really like Dumb and Dumber. Maybe, we could get the rights to that for a case of beer and some potato peelers.

PMO
©2010

Fat Tax

Stop! Don’t eat that cup cake, candy bar or slice of pie. It’s coming. The fat tax. Say What?  There has been much discussion about obesity in this country. Now the government is trying to determine who should take action to stop it. Obviously the citizens are not doing a good job.

Every year, billions of dollars are spent on health care for obesity related health problems. That’s reason enough for government intervention. However, as in past health matters, people just don’t want to stop whatever it is they are doing. So, what is the solution? Taxes!! Cigarettes and booze are taxed - cigarettes at a shameful level. Have people stopped smoking and drinking? No.

It’s really okay if people don’t stop whatever government doesn’t want them to do so long as they pay the tax. If fat people want to be fat, then they have to pay!

That brings up questions - how do you determine who is over weight; at what rate should the tax be; how do you tell the tax has been paid and a host of other unknowns?

I have some suggestions. First, we need an official looking weight chart. You know, the kind with height and weight. It doesn’t have to consider any factors except what some Nanny wants to think is acceptable.

Next, we will need a tax rate. How about a dollar per pound as determined by the Nanny approved chart. So, if a person is fifty pounds overweight, a $50.00 tax would be assessed. That doesn’t seem like too much, but that would have to be per month or even per week. Now we are talking tax revenue!

Of course, we will have to have proof that the tax has been paid. Perhaps, a sticker that is issued at your local government funded tax office. The sticker could be good for thirty days, then you have to be weighed again - just in case you gained some more weight. You, the shameful person, would have to wear the sticker in a conspicuous place - like on your forehead or your behind. That way, everyone would know you had paid your fair share.

If this all sounds ridiculous, absolutely absurd and just down right stupid, then you better start losing some weight. Who knows what the official chart will say about you.

I sure hope they don’t implement an ugly tax. It could wipe me out.

PMO
©2010

From The Inbox

I got this email awhile back.  It just makes sense.

Indian Chief Two Eagles was asked by a white U.S. government official,

"You have observed the white man for 90 years. You've seen his wars and his technological advances. You've seen his progress, and the damage he's done."

The Chief nodded in agreement.

The official continued, 'Considering all these events, in your opinion, where did the white man go wrong?'

The Chief stared at the government official for over a minute and then calmly replied,

"When white man find land, Indians running it, no taxes, no debt, plenty buffalo, plenty beaver, clean water. Women did all the work, Medicine man free. Indian man spend all day hunting and fishing; all night having sex."

Then the chief leaned back and smiled, "Only white man dumb enough to think he could improve system like that.."

Proof In The Protest

Should you want to measure the State of the Union, just look at the protest events. Let’s look at a few examples.

We have seen multiple protest for gay rights. To let you know how dumb I am, I didn’t know gays didn’t have rights. But, they seem to think that because of their lifestyle, they are entitled to special rights.

Then, we have illegal immigrants rights. Literally millions march in the streets of U.S. cities to proclaim their rights. Again, here’s my dumbness. I didn’t know that people that are not citizens of this country have rights to impose severe financial hardship on tax payers by using social services they are not entitled to. Oops, I should not say, they are not entitled to. I mean if some group moves into your house, uninvited, and sets themselves up a residents, are they not supposed to eat your food, watch your television and expect you to educate their children and provide free medical care? They have rights.

And to keep it short, let’s look at the protest, over the weekend, to the pray for America event in Houston. Those silly Christians think they can just get together and pray. The protesters surely showed them that they are racist, terrorist, and discriminate against non believers and those with other gods. At least that’s what they showed on TV news.

Well, there you have it Mr. And Mrs. America.

PMO
©2011

Energy Efficiency

Here’s your energy efficiency tip. Put lots of insulation in the attic of your house. After that, if you ain’t using it, turn it off.

It’s August in Texas and it is hot. It was hot last August and if August comes around next year it will be hot.

Mark Twain said, "everybody complains about the weather but nobody does anything about it." Something tells me that may what the government spends the next stimulus package on - fixing the weather.

Watching and listening to people is more fun than watching television.

PMO
©2011

Instructions

This is a two step plan to take over this country. All it takes for the plan to work is to implement it slowly and methodically. This approach has worked through out history so it is tested and proved.

Step one is to take over the education system. Get them early. Start in kindergarten teaching that feelings are more important than facts. Give them a "worthy cause" such as the environment and that is okay for Susie to have two mommies. Slowly abolish any mention of God and play down patriotism. Teach sharing is more important than having what you work for all to yourself. Carry this thinking forward through middle and high school. In college train students that only through enlightenment can the world become risk free.

From the get go, you have to convince them that good is not always good and bad is not always bad.

Step two is: manipulate the media. Convince them they are your friends and that you take care of your friends. Feed their egos. Discretely punish any media member that does not follow you without question. Make them believe they are part of the elite.

It’s that simple.

PMO
©2011

What Is It?

The darkness claws at my mind,

pulling me back in space and time,

Drawing me to traps set long before,

that bring the nightmares to my door.

While I gasp and struggle with all my might

to reach the fading pure white light.

The darkness power does not slip,

But holds fast in its tireless grip.

Though, I have escaped before,

fatigue gives way to the more.

Until at last, the darkness prevails,

with black remembrances of the travails.

PMO
©2011

Hot

Hot weather makes grumpy old men grumpier.  I don't know why, but it does.  Right now in Texas, it's hot.  Gets that way every year and I don't know why somebody doesn't do something about it.

We could pipe our heat to Alaska and they could send us some cold in return.  Sure it would cost a lot to do it, but on days when the temperature goes beyond 105, I know a lot of people that would pay.  Heck, we could make it a stimulus project and the Feds would pay for it.

Just how hot is it?  Fire ants are dancing because their feet are hot; you could fry an egg on the sidewalk except they come out of the chickens hard boiled; lady bugs are wearing bikinis; rednecks don't go all the way to the little house out behind the house, they just stand on the porch and let'r rip; there's no road rage because people don't want to get out of their air conditioned cars; and politicians won't kiss babies for fear of getting a heat rash.

If none of this makes sense to you, then it wasn't supposed to.

PMO
©2011

I'm Listening

OK, I'm listening.  Please explain to me how government can borrow money that can never be paid back and it is a good deal.

I am serious.  Explain it to me.

PMO
©2011