Thursday, April 30, 2015

Question For SCOTUS

By what authority can the Supreme Court of The United States, or any state for that matter, decide if marriage is only between a man and a woman? This is not a constitutional issue. This law has been settled for centuries - since Adam and Eve. Only the guy that made the law can change it.

He over rules all man made laws.

PMO
©2015

Wednesday, April 29, 2015

Running Mate

I have already predicted that Hillary will be the next Prez. What is there that will prevent it? She even wears pant suits like the leader of North Korea. Sorry. That was a bit tacky.

But to be absolutely sure she gets a landslide vote, she will need the perfect running mate. You may not have heard this name before, but don’t be surprised. Tammy Baldwin. She is the junior Senator, Democrat, from Wisconsin. And, she is open about being a lesbian. The first in the Senate.

Talk about your dream team.

PMO
©2015

Tuesday, April 28, 2015

More Communication

We have a lot of conversation but dang little communication. I’ve said that before. And, I tire of talking or listening when there is no communication. There are lots of reasons for the lack thereof. But every now and then, one does experience real communication and it is a real pleasure.

A simple example is a trip to the neighborhood hardware store. "I need a thing-a-ma-jig that connects the whats-ma-call-it to the do–hickey." The clerk replies, "What size?"

Now, that’s communication.

He suggested I get a large roll of duct tape, just in case.

PMO
©2015

Monday, April 27, 2015

No Dollar

On the reverse side of weight loss is weight gain, for all us skinny people. When someone comments about how skinny I am my reply is, "There are millions of people spending billions of dollars to look like me. I get it for free."

You don’t hear much about weight gain products. There are a few and a few doctors that will tell you what to do to gain weight. As in weight loss, the products and plans don’t usually work. But, do not despair, I am here again with a tried and proved methods to gain weight.

When I was 15, I lived with my aunt, uncle and cousins one summer, so I could work. Nobody asked me if I wanted to work, but that didn’t seem to matter. I had two jobs for about three months and when I came home I still didn’t have any money.

We had breakfast at 7:00 a.m. that always included biscuits, gravy and fried potatoes. Sometimes there was fried sausage and eggs. On the days my cousins and I ate lunch at home, we always had biscuits, gravy and fried potatoes. If we ate lunch at work, we had hamburgers, french fries, and a milk shake. An afternoon snack was french fries and a shake. The evening meal, served at 6:00 p.m. sharp, always included biscuits, gravy and fried potatoes. Then it was time to go to the night job.

Usually around 10 o’clock, we’d stop chicken fried steak, biscuits, gravy and fried potatoes. And, when we quit for the night around 3 or 4 in the morning, we’d stop for pie, ice cream and a soda.

In a three month period, I gained 21 pounds. It took only three weeks to lose it all, when I returned home to Texas.

If one eats a lot of fattening food about six or seven times per day, one tends to gain some weight. A bit of caution, some may not lose it so easily. Then you have to move over to the other people side and try all the things that don’t work.

I like being skinny. It grates on those that are not.

PMO

©2015

Sunday, April 26, 2015

Billion Dollar Business

The diet and weight loss industry is a billion dollar business. You know why? Because diets and weight loss pills and programs don’t work. If they worked, they would go out of business. Check it out for yourself and you will discover, I am right again.

When I worked in risk management, I developed programs to reduce health care cost. And, I came up with a sure fire weight loss program. All it takes is 4 saltine crackers and 6 to 8 ounces of water twenty minutes before meal time, so your brain will think you are full. You can have what you want and all you want at meals, but you cannot have anything to eat between means. Not even a nighttime snack. Don’t believe me? Try it for 90 days and see what happens.

There was a second program that my company wouldn’t support. It was 2 slices of cucumber and a shot of whiskey, for lunch and dinner. That’s all you get, and no snacks.

The people that try this diet not only lose weigh, they are a lot happier.

PMO
©2015

Saturday, April 25, 2015

Memory Tricks

As people get older, their memory declines. This is a natural event and can cause problems - more for some than others. Doctors and scientist have tried to come up with a pill to correct this problem, but the bottom line is, nothing really works. That means you can stop spending money on all those products and brain exercises that make claims about improving memory. Exercise and a good diet appears to be the best approach to maintaining memory.

I certainly don’t remember as well as I used to. It really gets on my nerves, not being able to recall something instantly. So, I have little "tricks" I use. I maintain a calendar to remind me where I’m supposed to be and what to do when I get here. Post it notes are all over my computer and desk. I keep a running list of things I’m supposed to get when I make my shopping trips to the grocery and Wally Mart.

For the really important stuff, I have a special list. This is where I write down those things I must remember and the most important things I have to do.

I just wish I could remember where I put the list.

PMO
©2015

Friday, April 24, 2015

Communication Gap

This week I had a conversation with a woman that was telling me a story about an elderly woman she knows. "She don’t know if she’s washing or hanging out," she said. I know what that means, but I got to thinking about my granddaughter’s generation. You’d likely get a blank stare if she heard this.

Today’s generation talks in abbreviations or acronyms. Hash tag this or that, lol, bff, and all that other stuff I do not understand. Forget foreign languages, we can’t talk from one generation to another.

How about "light a shuck," or "high tail?" Does  "Half a bubble off plumb," or "lickety split," mean anything to you? If so, "you are too old to cut the mustard anymore." I grew up in the "beat" generation where "cool," "groovy," and "hairy" meant something. Older people looked at us like we were crazy, and we were.

When you factor in geographic location, actual communication really drops. Folks in East Texas use different phrases than those in New Jersey. It’s no wonder we have problems in this country. We have generations that don’t have any idea what the others are talking about. Instead of learning a foreign language, we should focus on learning to speak to each other first.

Just for the record, I’m still "cool and groovy."

Or, maybe I'm just "beat."

PMO
©2015

Thursday, April 23, 2015

Searching

Diogenes reportedly walked about with a lantern, searching for an honest man. I’m guessing if he was still alive, he’d still be looking. What we need today is someone searching for common sense. Obviously it has gone away.

I’m talking about common sense enough to come inside out of the rain, know the difference between right and wrong, male and female, and a clear understanding that if you turn your house into a sewer, the filth and smell will overcome you.

Light your lantern and start looking.

It may take awhile to find it.

PMO
©2015

Wednesday, April 22, 2015

Earth Day

Let’s face the facts. If mankind destroys the earth, we won’t have any place to live. Second fact, it is impossible for us to destroy the earth. We can make the environment unliveable, but the earth will heal itself. Them are the facts, folks.

Earth day is a good money making event and it keeps the folks that like to play Chicken Little happy. If they weren’t running around shouting, "the sky is falling" they would have to find something else to do and it could be worse.

The truth is that the earth has been warming since the end of the ice age. And, if we don’t have another ice age, then in about a billion years, we may have to learn to live in a hot climate.

Meanwhile, what are we to do? Fly around in jet planes raising money and living the life of luxury. If you really want to save the earth, all you have to do is get rid of the people.

Let’s see a showing of hands on that solution.

PMO
©2015

Tuesday, April 21, 2015

Foolish Questions

About a million years ago there was a country music song titled, "Foolish Questions." One line said, "You lather up your face and your wife ask, "Are you going to shave?" Nope, just thought I’d lather up a bit."

And, someone ask why you are all dressed up, to which you reply, "I’m going to Ned’s funeral." They respond, "Is Ned dead?" Guess Ned thought he’d have his funeral and get it off his to do list.

The point is that most days, you get a lot of foolish questions. One gets to thinking they are talking to a bunch of network news anchors.

Every time I have to go to a doctor I always am greeted with, "How are you today?"

I usually reply, "Not well or else I wouldn’t be here."

PMO
©2015

Monday, April 20, 2015

No Mites

Here’s a bit of news you may have missed. Scientist, whom ever they are, have reported that some species of birds are lining their nest with cigarette butts. Why? To keep mites away.

So, now you know. If you don’t want to have mites, get some cigarette butts. I have been smoking for over fifty years and have never had mites.

Chiggers, gnats, ants, spiders, wasps, fleas and ticks, but no mites.

PMO
©2015

Sunday, April 19, 2015

Rule #34

Here’s another one of the official grumpy old man rules for life. It may be the most difficult rule of them all to keep. #34: "Don’t hurt the ones that love you." How many of you have ever done or said something that you would undo or take back, but it’s too late? If you haven’t, you can stop reading here, because you are dead.

Everything from hurt feelings to destroying a life of someone that loves you are daily occurrences. I know that I’ve hurt the ones that I love the most. And, I have been devastated by the ones I love the most.

If you can follow rule #34, you will have followed several of the other rules.

PMO
©2015

Saturday, April 18, 2015

New $20 Bill

Senator Jeanne Shaheen of New Hampshire, filed legislation this week that would create a citizens panel to recommend a choice to the treasury secretary for a female face on the $20 bill. The last female on paper money was Martha Washington, and that was on the Silver Certificate $1 bill. No more "One Silver Dollar" on the note. So, the senator thinks now it is time to get rid of Andy J.

Women have appeared on coins, such as the Susan B. Anthony dollar and a couple of others. No one seemed to like those because they were not practical to carry. Especially for women.

I would like to recommend my financial controller’s picture.  She will keep them in circulation.

I can guarantee it.

PMO
©2015

Friday, April 17, 2015

The Way To Play

A priest in Madison, Wisconsin has reportedly offered a solution to gay and lesbian wedding problems. A Christian bakery, florist, photographer, bed and bath or whatever business should provide the services - under contract. The contract should state clearly that the money for the services will be donated to a pro-traditional marriage lobby or legitimate organization. And, the company will run an ad in the newspaper thanking those, by name(s), making the purchase, for their contribution to the movement.

There is no discrimination in that action and everybody is happy.

Well, maybe not.

PMO
©2015

Thursday, April 16, 2015

Missouri Madness

Missouri House Bill 813, introduced by Republican state Rep Rick Brattin, would prohibit a recipient of the SNAP (Supplemental Nutrition Assistance Program) from using the benefits for cookies, chips, energy drinks, soft drinks, seafood or steak. What??? No filet or lobster?

What’s next? Surely they won’t think about prosecuting those that sell their benefits for pennies on the dollar to buy alcohol, tattoos, lottery tickets and other stuff.

It’s madness I tell you. Sheer madness.

What’s a poor person to do?

Don't you dare think, "get a job."

PMO
©2015

Wednesday, April 15, 2015

Tax Day

I am a fan of Will Rogers and often use his quotes. Because this is tax day, this one seems most appropriate.

"The income tax has made more liars out of the American people than golf has. Even when you make a tax form out on the level, you don’t know when it’s through if you are a crook or a martyr."

If all the politicians would only realize, the way to get elected is to do away with the income tax.

That’ll happen when donkeys fly.

PMO
©2015

Tuesday, April 14, 2015

The Iron Lady

British Prime Minister Margaret Thatcher (1925-2013): "America, my friends, is the only country in the world actually founded on liberty — the only one. People went to America to be free."

How many of us have ever considered this fact?

Next question: What will it take to keep America free?

PMO
©2015

Monday, April 13, 2015

Woman President

Here she comes out of shoot number one! It’s Hillary for Prez!  Everyone knows it time for a woman to president and she says that she is a woman. I thought that was obvious, but thank you for reassuring us. I would like to question who "everyone" includes.

She doesn’t seem to have much of a platform except she is a woman. If one can get elected on that, then I would like to suggest we get someone with a bit more eye appeal and personality. Oops, there comes my male chauvinist sneaking out. Surely, she is not going to run on her past performances. Her record is not a shining example of success.

Oh well. All "everyone" needs to do is trust her. And, "what does it matter?"

If all else fails, she’ll need to get elected, "for the children."

PMO
©2015

Sunday, April 12, 2015

Adverse Reactions

At the insistence of my financial controller and ace number one daughter, I went to a new doctor this past week. I don’t like to go to doctors. All they do is tell me to quit smoking and give me a prescription for something that has a higher death rate than caused by smoking.

My visit went exactly as expected and the good doctor gave me a prescription to cure all my afflictions. As is my nature, I looked up the drug to see what the side effects are. With a couple of exceptions, the list of common reactions are exactly like the symptoms I have. How am I supposed to know if I get better? I am not making this up.

Truth is truly stranger than fiction.

PMO
©2015

Saturday, April 11, 2015

The News

I read and listen to a lot of news. If that’s what you call it. Having had a number of years in the reporting business, trust me, you don’t get much news now days. Anyway, I have summed up all the news worth knowing this week.

First, Hillary Clinton is attempting to raise an enormous amount of money for her presidential campaign. I hope she promises to keep track of all that money on her personal server at home.

And, Muslims are now allowed to use toilet paper.

That’s it folks. All the news worth reporting.

PMO
©2015

Friday, April 10, 2015

UFO

Listening to talk radio recently, there was discussion about flying saucers - visitors from another planet. The question is, "do you believe in them?" My answer is yes and no, and that’s final.

I believe that there may be life on another planet. It would have to be in human form, because the one maker that made all the universe said, "in our own image." Where such life exists I have no idea.

To have visitors from another planet is not so likely. They would have to have some super duper technology to get here. And, if they are searching for intelligent life, they would have a wasted trip.

But, maybe they do drop by now and then for a good laugh.

PMO
©2015

Thursday, April 9, 2015

Better Deal

If you happen to be from El Salvador, Guatemala or Honduras and are in this country illegally but meet certain standards, the good ole USA will fly your children, under the age of 21, to be with you. This will save the children from all the dangers of traveling themselves and making an illegal entry at the border.

The best part is that the children, "parolees" get taxpayer funded perks and benefits like free education, food stamps, medical care and living expenses.

Sounds like a better deal than I have.

PMO
©2015

Wednesday, April 8, 2015

It's Up To You

Most of us who stayed awake during history classes know that Benjamin Franklin was instrumental in forming our nation. At the close of the Constitutional Convention in Philadelphia, as Ben was leaving, a bystander asked, "Well, Doctor, what have we got -a republic or a monarchy?"

"A republic," Franklin replied, "if you can keep it."

I wonder what Doctor Franklin would think about the way it is today.

PMO
©2015

Tuesday, April 7, 2015

More Attacks

You may have heard about military chaplains getting punished for expressing the views of their faiths, or you may not have. A couple of cases sum up what is happening.

Capt. Joe Lawhorn was punished for making references to the Bible and distributing a handout citing Christian scriptures during a suicide prevention seminar at the University of North Georgia.

Lt. Cmdr. Wes Modder, a decorated chaplain, was removed from his unit after some service members complained about his views on homosexuality and sexual relationships outside of marriage.

Duh! What were these chaplains hired to do? They are bound by their denominational beliefs to exercise their faith in teaching and counseling. That’s their job.

Over the years, I’ve listened to others speak about non-Christian beliefs. That’s all I did, listen. I made no effort to make them stop, because they have the right to speak, and be wrong. In the military, a chaplain has two jobs, be a leader of faith and be a soldier. If a chaplain can’t help, he/she are directed to direct a service man/woman to someone that can. But, there is nothing by military law that says a chaplain must shut up about teaching and preaching.

The bottom line is that these attacks are just another shot to destroy Christianity or make it mute. A really long time ago, a Pharisee named Gamaliel, speaking to the Sanhedrin about killing the apostles said that if the men were nothing, they would do no harm, but if they were speaking from God, then trying to squelch them would be fighting God. Acts 5:34-39.

So here’s a tip for those that want to pervert the Bible, disavow or not believe. One should never tug on Superman’s cape, spit into the wind, or mess with God or His people.

When He has enough, happy days are over.

PMO
©2015

Monday, April 6, 2015

The Future

According to a study titled, "The Future of World Religions: Population Growth Projections, 2010-2050," the Pew Research Center estimates that in the next four decades, Christians will barely out number Muslims. Muslims will have the most growth during that time which will see the world population grow to 9.3 billion. Just think how hard it’s going to be to find a parking space then.

The Pew report says that if the current trends continue, in 2050 there will be 2.9 billion Christians and 2.8 billion Muslims in the world. And, Islam will replace Judaism as the second most non-Christian religion in the United States. Sub-Saharan Africa is predicted to be home to 40 percent of the world’s Christians.

My predictions are, if these projections are true, pig farming is going to take a hit in the USA, and, now may be a good time to start raising chickens in Africa.

Christians like fried chicken - especially Baptist Christians.

PMO
©2015

Sunday, April 5, 2015

No Rabbits

Bunny rabbits and hunting eggs has as much to do with Easter as Santa Claus has to do with Christmas. But, it entertains the kids and gets the adults to spend money. Is that what it’s all about?

In the history of mankind, there has never been an event as significant as Easter. It is a historical fact that the man called Jesus was killed, buried and rose from the dead three days later. Numerous witnesses testified to these facts. And since then millions upon millions have testified that they have met him spiritually and He is alive.

Any questions?

©2015

Saturday, April 4, 2015

What Would You Do?

Christians have suffered for their beliefs for centuries. Even today, around the world they are murdered, just for being Christian. On a talk show his week, there was discussion about what one might do if presented with a situation where you had to renounce the Christian belief or die.

Today in this country, Christians are being sued, threatened death, or worse for refusing to abandon their faith and belief. Even our government sides with those against Christian beliefs and traditions.

I am reminded of Polycarp, possibly the last person to have known an apostle, having been a disciple of St. John. Polycarp was an old man when faced with death at the hands of the Roman proconsul if he did not renounce Christ. He simply said, "86 years have I served him, and he has done me no wrong. How can I blaspheme my King and Savior."

So, the question remains the same since Jesus came. What would you do?

Happy Easter

©2015

Friday, April 3, 2015

Lay Low

Recently I spoke to an old friend about what’s going on in the country and around the world. He suggested that I not worry so much and just "lay low," and wait and see.

I wish I could do that.

PMO
©2015

Thursday, April 2, 2015

Under Attack

The recent turmoil about a new law in Indiana and now Arkansas is undeniably an attack on the Christian faith. The LGBT is out to destroy anything or anyone that resists their objectives. While they proclaim tolerance and acceptance, their actions are the opposite.

The amazing point is that major corporations and organizations are taking action against states that are trying to protect "rights" of their citizens. And, now the states are backing down. It would seem that Christian and other faiths no longer have the right to refuse to embrace the movement of 1% of the population.

I am not suggesting that there should be discrimination against anyone, but if faith prevents a shop owner from refusing service or goods, then why not walk down the street to another shop. The intent appears to be to force America to abandon the principles upon which the country was built.

One might suspect that the homosexual movement really wants to be in a position to recruit since they cannot reproduce. If they can establish that their lifestyle must be accepted, then it follows that they can entice the young into thinking that Christian or other religious beliefs mean nothing. It doesn’t take a genius to see that unless all religions stand up and fight for their beliefs, then they all will fall by the wayside.

If that happens, then all of humanity loses.

PMO
©2015

Wednesday, April 1, 2015

For Men Only

Eight out of ten women will read this. Of the other two, one is blind and the other one can’t read. Now, on with my counseling for men. There is something you have to know, if you haven’t figured it out, about the female specie. There is something in their DNA that men don’t have. It is powerful force that takes control of them and causes them to cast aside all rhyme and reason. It is SHOPPING!

In cave man days, men hunted and fished to bring meat to the table. This is also where men learned not to talk, for fear of scaring the game or fish. Women would gather fruits and herbs and learned how to talk incessantly to scare off any predators. As mankind evolved into shopping malls, men didn’t like them because there was no place to hunt or fish, but women still think they are gathering and scaring off predators.

My financial controller is a shopper all by herself. When you add my ace number one daughter, you double the adventure. Add two granddaughters and I believe they could bankrupt Warren Buffett in one afternoon.

Upon returning from shopping I often ask my financial controller, "What did you get?" If she says, "Oh, not much," that means less than $200. "Just a few little things" can translate out to real money. And, "This and that," is concern that you may have to sell the house.

If she says, "Everything was on sale."

It’s time to sign up for food stamps.

PMO
©2015