Who decided that we should make New Year’s resolutions? It must have been "they." "They" decide everything.
So what are your resolutions this year? Loose weight - there’s a billion dollar industry that will help you loose whatever weight in money you have in your pocket. Perhaps, it is to exercise more - again there are more exercise machines for sell than there are people. How about being kinder and more generous - don’t worry about this one, the government has taken care of it for you. Then there’s the always popular, to spend more time with family - there is a high probability that they don’t want to spend more time with you.
What are the other favorites? Quit smoking. Start Smoking. Quit drinking. Drink more. Spend less on losing weight and exercising. The list can go on and on - forever.
Why not take my approach? I resolved years ago to make no resolutions.
It’s the only resolution that I have no problem keeping.
Happy New Year.
PMO
©2011
Saturday, December 31, 2011
Friday, December 30, 2011
Guns Required
Not everyone agrees with me about guns. That’s okay. You can be wrong if you want to. I see a gun as a tool and a form of recreation. It’s fun to shoot. I don’t shoot furry little animals or birdies.
There is, has been, and always will be arguments for and against citizens having guns. But, little Kennesaw, Georgia passed a law in 1982 requiring all heads of households to own a gun and ammunition. They still have the distinction of being the only place in the U.S. that requires guns. According to a Reuters news report, April 18, 2007, resident Robert Jones says, "People in Europe feel they need to be protected by government. People in the U.S. feel they need to be protected from the government. He owns a .357 caliber Magnum. I must admit that I can agree with his statement, but I disagree with his choice of guns. A trusty .45 caliber is hard to beat and it isn’t as loud as a .357.
I do need to mention that the law in Kennesaw exempts those with criminal records, mental issues and those that can’t afford a gun. I would be inclined to set up an easy payment plan for those that can’t afford one.
Only about 50% of the residents have guns according to the police department there. The law isn’t strictly enforced. But at least it keeps half the town wondering about the other half.
Kennesaw attracts tourists because of their unique law. You can even get a tee shirt with a picture of two guns and a statement, "It’s The Law." And, the town has grown from 5,000 in 1982 to about 30,000 now.
Now, I’ve told you all that to tell you all this. I am wondering if we could get such a law passed in my little burg. It’s not that I want people that should not have guns to have one, but we could use the tourist revenue. My burg needs economic development. If for nothing else, to fix the streets.
We don’t get a lot of tourists at the gas station. It’s our only attraction.
PMO
©2011
There is, has been, and always will be arguments for and against citizens having guns. But, little Kennesaw, Georgia passed a law in 1982 requiring all heads of households to own a gun and ammunition. They still have the distinction of being the only place in the U.S. that requires guns. According to a Reuters news report, April 18, 2007, resident Robert Jones says, "People in Europe feel they need to be protected by government. People in the U.S. feel they need to be protected from the government. He owns a .357 caliber Magnum. I must admit that I can agree with his statement, but I disagree with his choice of guns. A trusty .45 caliber is hard to beat and it isn’t as loud as a .357.
I do need to mention that the law in Kennesaw exempts those with criminal records, mental issues and those that can’t afford a gun. I would be inclined to set up an easy payment plan for those that can’t afford one.
Only about 50% of the residents have guns according to the police department there. The law isn’t strictly enforced. But at least it keeps half the town wondering about the other half.
Kennesaw attracts tourists because of their unique law. You can even get a tee shirt with a picture of two guns and a statement, "It’s The Law." And, the town has grown from 5,000 in 1982 to about 30,000 now.
Now, I’ve told you all that to tell you all this. I am wondering if we could get such a law passed in my little burg. It’s not that I want people that should not have guns to have one, but we could use the tourist revenue. My burg needs economic development. If for nothing else, to fix the streets.
We don’t get a lot of tourists at the gas station. It’s our only attraction.
PMO
©2011
Thursday, December 29, 2011
Voter ID
I know this is a stupid question, but, "What is the big deal about requiring a photo ID to vote?" This appears to be a major issue according to Fox News.com. It seems that the Democrats oppose the idea because it is not fair to minorities and the poor. But, in Rhode Island, photo Ids were approved by Democrats and a Democratic Legislature. Don’t they have any minorities or poor in Rhode Island?
It would appear that even those opposing the idea can’t agree. The problem may be that states that have had the requirement for years, find voter participation increases - including minorities.
Republicans counter the argument with the facts that it is just a matter of common sense. I don’t think you can use "common sense" as an argument anymore because very few people seen to have any.
If you have to have a photo ID to sign up for welfare, get on an airplane, buy tobacco or alcoholic beverages, or even use a credit card, then what is the issue with showing one to vote? Is it possible to live in this world today without a photo ID?
I have said all that to say this, "If there ever was any doubt about the sanity of our politicians, then this ought to remove that doubt."
I have to have an ID to get into my house. My financial controller says I don’t look like the dark haired young man she married. She often checks my birth certificate and finger prints.
Whatever the outcome of the voter ID photo issue, when it comes time to vote, remember to vote and vote often.
PMO
©2011
It would appear that even those opposing the idea can’t agree. The problem may be that states that have had the requirement for years, find voter participation increases - including minorities.
Republicans counter the argument with the facts that it is just a matter of common sense. I don’t think you can use "common sense" as an argument anymore because very few people seen to have any.
If you have to have a photo ID to sign up for welfare, get on an airplane, buy tobacco or alcoholic beverages, or even use a credit card, then what is the issue with showing one to vote? Is it possible to live in this world today without a photo ID?
I have said all that to say this, "If there ever was any doubt about the sanity of our politicians, then this ought to remove that doubt."
I have to have an ID to get into my house. My financial controller says I don’t look like the dark haired young man she married. She often checks my birth certificate and finger prints.
Whatever the outcome of the voter ID photo issue, when it comes time to vote, remember to vote and vote often.
PMO
©2011
Wednesday, December 28, 2011
Don't Leave Home
The National Highway Traffic Safety Administration says that the highest number of auto accidents occur at speeds between 35-40 miles per hour. Further more, their 2009 data reveals that these accidents occur between 3:00 pm and 9:00 pm. For years, it has been widely circulated that most auto accidents occur less than 25 miles from your home.
These statistics explain a lot about driving in metropolitan areas. While most drivers, unaware of the numbers, chug along trying to get through traffic, there are those that must have a phobia of the facts. You see them driving 90 miles per hour, weaving in and out of traffic and looking at their watch.
Now I know why these people behave as they do. They are staying above the accident speed range and trying to get 25 miles away from home, especially during critical driving time.
As for me, I am getting a bumper sticker like the one I saw this week. It simply states, "Retired - Go Around Me."
PMO
©2011
These statistics explain a lot about driving in metropolitan areas. While most drivers, unaware of the numbers, chug along trying to get through traffic, there are those that must have a phobia of the facts. You see them driving 90 miles per hour, weaving in and out of traffic and looking at their watch.
Now I know why these people behave as they do. They are staying above the accident speed range and trying to get 25 miles away from home, especially during critical driving time.
As for me, I am getting a bumper sticker like the one I saw this week. It simply states, "Retired - Go Around Me."
PMO
©2011
Tuesday, December 27, 2011
Why Blog?
It has been said that everyone has at least one book in them. That may be true, but the trick is to get the book out of the person and onto the page. Actually, I’m glad everyone doesn’t write a book. I don’t have time to read seven billion books. And, if it is best to write about what you know, then all those books would be about a lot of people that I don’t know.
That brings up my next question, why would anybody want to write a daily blog? There must be some deep dark psychological reason people blog. Perhaps it is to vent about something or maybe it’s a simple as wanting to share undisputed truth and wisdom. Neither of those apply here.
When I started writing, I had only one goal in mind. I forgot what it was. So I came up with another goal, but then got sidetracked on that one. So as you see today, I try to give you insight into grumpy old men.
It is my hope that when you read all my junk, that you will laugh a lot, think a lot and sometime just wonder, "what is he talking about?"
I really do a good job on making people wonder what I’m talking about.
PMO
©2011
That brings up my next question, why would anybody want to write a daily blog? There must be some deep dark psychological reason people blog. Perhaps it is to vent about something or maybe it’s a simple as wanting to share undisputed truth and wisdom. Neither of those apply here.
When I started writing, I had only one goal in mind. I forgot what it was. So I came up with another goal, but then got sidetracked on that one. So as you see today, I try to give you insight into grumpy old men.
It is my hope that when you read all my junk, that you will laugh a lot, think a lot and sometime just wonder, "what is he talking about?"
I really do a good job on making people wonder what I’m talking about.
PMO
©2011
Monday, December 26, 2011
Police Advertising
According to an AP story in the daily dribble, Syracuse, New York is entertaining the idea of selling advertsing on the police cars. As is pointed out in the story, police have suffered donut jokes for years, but what will happen if they start driving mobile billboards?
I realize that the economy is bad, but can this really be the answer? We already have municipal stadiums with "naming rights." In "Big D" and other cities, the city owned transit system is plastered with ads on buses and trains. Where are we headed? Is the next step ads on city limit signs? I can see it now, "Welcome to Cleveland - brought to you by Charmin."
What kind of person reads ads on city vehicles? My best guess is someone that is "really" bored.
Okay, if we must, let's put banners or bumper stickers on police cars. But, if we are going to do it, let's get some attention.
I can visualize it. A Syracuse police cruiser with Viagra plastered across the hood and back.
That would put a whole new meaning to "Protect and Serve."
PMO
©2011
I realize that the economy is bad, but can this really be the answer? We already have municipal stadiums with "naming rights." In "Big D" and other cities, the city owned transit system is plastered with ads on buses and trains. Where are we headed? Is the next step ads on city limit signs? I can see it now, "Welcome to Cleveland - brought to you by Charmin."
What kind of person reads ads on city vehicles? My best guess is someone that is "really" bored.
Okay, if we must, let's put banners or bumper stickers on police cars. But, if we are going to do it, let's get some attention.
I can visualize it. A Syracuse police cruiser with Viagra plastered across the hood and back.
That would put a whole new meaning to "Protect and Serve."
PMO
©2011
Sunday, December 25, 2011
Patient Father
It’s interesting who you meet along life’s journey. I know a father that has a bunch of kids. I’m not exactly sure how many, but a bunch is a lot. He is the most patient father I’ve ever seen.
He isn’t real strong on discipline, at least by my standards. His kids do anything they want. He tells them that if they don’t straighten up, he will punish them, but that doesn’t seem to slow them down. There are some that behave pretty good, sometime, but even they don’t always take his advice and guidance. I just don’t see how he does it. I’d be tempted to take a big stick and see if I could get their attention, but not him. And, he is not even trying to be politically correct by not wacking them. That’s just the way he feels.
He feels if he loves them enough, they will love him back. As far as I have seen, the only time they love him back is when they are in trouble or want something. He does help them when they get in over their heads, but I have to give it him, he doesn’t spoil them with gifts. He told me, one time he gave them the most precious gift he had, but most of them still ignore him.
Kids! What are you going to do with them? His ways seem very strange to me, but I am strange. His patience never runs out. Surely one of these days he’ll finally get fed up and let go on all of them. I’d guess they will all try to run off and hide under a mountain when he does. Something tells me that when his patience runs out, everybody better run.
PMO
©2011
He isn’t real strong on discipline, at least by my standards. His kids do anything they want. He tells them that if they don’t straighten up, he will punish them, but that doesn’t seem to slow them down. There are some that behave pretty good, sometime, but even they don’t always take his advice and guidance. I just don’t see how he does it. I’d be tempted to take a big stick and see if I could get their attention, but not him. And, he is not even trying to be politically correct by not wacking them. That’s just the way he feels.
He feels if he loves them enough, they will love him back. As far as I have seen, the only time they love him back is when they are in trouble or want something. He does help them when they get in over their heads, but I have to give it him, he doesn’t spoil them with gifts. He told me, one time he gave them the most precious gift he had, but most of them still ignore him.
Kids! What are you going to do with them? His ways seem very strange to me, but I am strange. His patience never runs out. Surely one of these days he’ll finally get fed up and let go on all of them. I’d guess they will all try to run off and hide under a mountain when he does. Something tells me that when his patience runs out, everybody better run.
PMO
©2011
Saturday, December 24, 2011
Christmas Is About?
What is Christmas all about? Presents - lots of presents. Football - enough football to last a lifetime. Then there’s food. Lots, lots, lots, and lots of food. A day off from work. Family gatherings where you get to spend the day opening presents, eating and watching football and complaining about having to go back to work.
Or it is about the following:
Luke Chapter 2
1
And it came to pass in those days, that there went out a decree from Caesar Augustus that all the world should be taxed.
©2011
Or it is about the following:
Luke Chapter 2
1
And it came to pass in those days, that there went out a decree from Caesar Augustus that all the world should be taxed.
2
And this taxing was first made when Cyrenius was governor of Syria.)
3
And all went to be taxed, every one into his own city.
4
And Joseph also went up from Galilee, out of the city of Nazareth, into Judaea, unto the city of David, which is called Bethlehem; (because he was of the house and lineage of David:)
5
To be taxed with Mary his espoused wife, being great with child.
6
And so it was, that, while they were there, the days were accomplished that she should be delivered.
7
And she brought forth her firstborn son, and wrapped him in swaddling clothes, and laid him in a manger; because there was no room for them in the inn.
8
And there were in the same country shepherds abiding in the field, keeping watch over their flock by night.
9
And, lo, the angel of the Lord came upon them, and the glory of the Lord shone round about them: and they were sore afraid.
10
And the angel said unto them, Fear not: for, behold, I bring you good tidings of great joy, which shall be to all people.
11
For unto you is born this day in the city of David a Saviour, which is Christ the Lord.
You decide what Christmas is all about for you.
©2011
Friday, December 23, 2011
Why The Media Hates Bush
I called my friend Larry today to wish him a Merry Christmas. As we often do, we talk about politics. He is in a political position and knows a bunch of elected representatives. He always has a lot of inside information that the 99.9% of the population never knows.
In our conversation, he brought up the "media." I don’t talk about the media much because there are few if any journalist in the media. I can say that because I used to be a reporter. The media today absolutely believes, "never let the truth ruin a good story."
Larry pointed out and I must say I agree, the reason the media hated President "W", was because he never took them on fancy vacations. They perceive themselves to be members of the elite. Therefore they like to be wined and dined in exotic places - a paid for vacation if you will. And, "W" went to Crawford, Texas for vacations. Do you know what there is to do in Crawford, Texas?
To make matters worse, "W" served ice tea. The boys and girls of the media expect to drink only the finest adult beverages. And, who ever heard of the elite eating barbeque. To add insult to injury, they didn’t have five star hotels with staffs scrambling to fill their every whim.
Now days, they fall over themselves to pump out what ever the current administration wants. Hey, they know on which side of their French toast is buttered. Hawaii for the "holidays" beats the heck out of Crawford, Texas.
So, let that be a lesson to anyone that may hold political office. If you want only your side of the story told, fix it where the media can be pampered.
Give me some pork ribs and a domestic beer. I don’t need them reporting about me.
PMO
©2011
In our conversation, he brought up the "media." I don’t talk about the media much because there are few if any journalist in the media. I can say that because I used to be a reporter. The media today absolutely believes, "never let the truth ruin a good story."
Larry pointed out and I must say I agree, the reason the media hated President "W", was because he never took them on fancy vacations. They perceive themselves to be members of the elite. Therefore they like to be wined and dined in exotic places - a paid for vacation if you will. And, "W" went to Crawford, Texas for vacations. Do you know what there is to do in Crawford, Texas?
To make matters worse, "W" served ice tea. The boys and girls of the media expect to drink only the finest adult beverages. And, who ever heard of the elite eating barbeque. To add insult to injury, they didn’t have five star hotels with staffs scrambling to fill their every whim.
Now days, they fall over themselves to pump out what ever the current administration wants. Hey, they know on which side of their French toast is buttered. Hawaii for the "holidays" beats the heck out of Crawford, Texas.
So, let that be a lesson to anyone that may hold political office. If you want only your side of the story told, fix it where the media can be pampered.
Give me some pork ribs and a domestic beer. I don’t need them reporting about me.
PMO
©2011
Thursday, December 22, 2011
Protests
Every year there are protests against Christmas displays. I suppose this has been going on since 1870 when Ulysses Grant signed into law some Federal holidays.
But this year is different. I have actually seen signs of push back against protests, like recently in Athens, Texas. Also, I have heard more people saying, "Merry Christmas" than I remember in a long time.
I would like to suggest to protesters that if you don’t like Christmas, then don’t participate. Don’t give or receive any presents. Don’t take off from work. Most employers can arrange for you to work. Of course, you get the same pay as you would if you take off and sit around watching football all day. Don’t eat all those Christmas goodies - like pecan pies. Mmmm.
Get your own holiday. March up to Congress and demand that you want a "non-holiday" holiday. Holiday means "Holy" day.
If you are successful and your holiday doesn’t really impose anything but good stuff on me, I’ll not complain about it.
Again, Ron White is right - "You just can’t fix stupid."
PMO
©2011
But this year is different. I have actually seen signs of push back against protests, like recently in Athens, Texas. Also, I have heard more people saying, "Merry Christmas" than I remember in a long time.
I would like to suggest to protesters that if you don’t like Christmas, then don’t participate. Don’t give or receive any presents. Don’t take off from work. Most employers can arrange for you to work. Of course, you get the same pay as you would if you take off and sit around watching football all day. Don’t eat all those Christmas goodies - like pecan pies. Mmmm.
Get your own holiday. March up to Congress and demand that you want a "non-holiday" holiday. Holiday means "Holy" day.
If you are successful and your holiday doesn’t really impose anything but good stuff on me, I’ll not complain about it.
Again, Ron White is right - "You just can’t fix stupid."
PMO
©2011
Wednesday, December 21, 2011
Ho Ho Ho
I went to the beauty saloon this week. You know, one of those uni-sex hair cutting places. I don’t know if I will ever adjust to not having barber shops.
The woman that cuts my hair has done so for a few years now. About every forth or fifth time she gets it close to the way I want it cut. The reason I keep going there is she does it better than anyone else I’ve found.
And, she has adjusted to me being me - somewhat. When she finished wacking on my hair this time, I paid her and gave her a nice tip for the holidays - much more than my usual one dollar tip. As I was walking to the door, she and just about everybody else shouted Merry Christmas and Happy New Year. No one was really surprised when I replied, "I can do one or the other but not both in this economy."
Ho Ho Ho
PMO
©2011
The woman that cuts my hair has done so for a few years now. About every forth or fifth time she gets it close to the way I want it cut. The reason I keep going there is she does it better than anyone else I’ve found.
And, she has adjusted to me being me - somewhat. When she finished wacking on my hair this time, I paid her and gave her a nice tip for the holidays - much more than my usual one dollar tip. As I was walking to the door, she and just about everybody else shouted Merry Christmas and Happy New Year. No one was really surprised when I replied, "I can do one or the other but not both in this economy."
Ho Ho Ho
PMO
©2011
Tuesday, December 20, 2011
Positive Benefits of Getting Old
After extensive research and careful analysis, I have identified the positive benefits of getting old.
There’s the benefit of getting a senior citizen discount at some fast food places.
The other one is, your chances of getting kidnaped are almost zero.
That's about it.
PMO
©2011
There’s the benefit of getting a senior citizen discount at some fast food places.
The other one is, your chances of getting kidnaped are almost zero.
That's about it.
PMO
©2011
Monday, December 19, 2011
Trillion Emails
Parade Magazine had an article this week about email service plagued by outages this year. In the article, Nathaniel Borenstein a pioneer in electronic mail said the sheer volume of email traffic was a major factor. According to the article, there approximately 107 trillion emails sent each year. Eighty nine percent are spam.
It seems to me that by now everyone would have a sufficient supply of Viagra and all the spam could stop. Guess not.
I think I got half of the 89%. I don’t buy anything, but I do give them the email address of people I don’t like.
PMO
©2011
It seems to me that by now everyone would have a sufficient supply of Viagra and all the spam could stop. Guess not.
I think I got half of the 89%. I don’t buy anything, but I do give them the email address of people I don’t like.
PMO
©2011
Sunday, December 18, 2011
Offended
I’m offended. I don’t know why, but I am. There has to be something that offends me. These days everyone is offended by something. It just seems to me that I have a "right" to be offended too.
Several years ago, I had a male employee that told me this story. He said that he was about to enter a store when he noticed a woman that was going to enter behind him. He politely opened the door to allow her to enter first. She stopped and said, "You don’t have to open the door for me because I am a lady." He replied, "I didn’t. I did it because I am a gentleman."
Since the non-religious, non-descriptive winter commercial break is approaching and I don’t want to offend anyone, the following paragraph is my perfect non-offensive statement for the season.
(Paragraph begins)
(Paragraph ends)
No doubt someone will be offended and call me a radical right wing racist homophobic terrorist.
PMO
©2011
Several years ago, I had a male employee that told me this story. He said that he was about to enter a store when he noticed a woman that was going to enter behind him. He politely opened the door to allow her to enter first. She stopped and said, "You don’t have to open the door for me because I am a lady." He replied, "I didn’t. I did it because I am a gentleman."
Since the non-religious, non-descriptive winter commercial break is approaching and I don’t want to offend anyone, the following paragraph is my perfect non-offensive statement for the season.
(Paragraph begins)
(Paragraph ends)
No doubt someone will be offended and call me a radical right wing racist homophobic terrorist.
PMO
©2011
Saturday, December 17, 2011
Who Is They?
Who is "they?" "They" are always dictating that you have to do this or you can’t do that. "They" make the rules. Sometimes it is "they" that did something - good or bad. "They" invent things and even go to the moon. "They" set the schedules. "They - they -they"
All I want is to identify "they." I want names, addresses, emails and phone numbers. Did "they" make a rule that "they" are to remain antonymous?
In all my life I have heard "they" over and over - maybe a million times, literally. I forgot to count. If "they" are so all important, don’t we need to know who "they" are? I for one would like to ask them some questions. Like, what are your qualifications and you do adhere to all the junk you spew?
It looks like only Pogo knows. He did say, "we have seen the enemy and "they" is us."
So "they" must be the enemy. At least we know that much.
PMO
©2011
All I want is to identify "they." I want names, addresses, emails and phone numbers. Did "they" make a rule that "they" are to remain antonymous?
In all my life I have heard "they" over and over - maybe a million times, literally. I forgot to count. If "they" are so all important, don’t we need to know who "they" are? I for one would like to ask them some questions. Like, what are your qualifications and you do adhere to all the junk you spew?
It looks like only Pogo knows. He did say, "we have seen the enemy and "they" is us."
So "they" must be the enemy. At least we know that much.
PMO
©2011
Friday, December 16, 2011
Confused?
Are you confused? If not, then try keeping up with all the candidates for President. All they have in common is the desire to expose what is or could be the other candidates faults. Silly me thinks that the focus of the primaries should be on what each candidate has to offer in managing the country. After all, that’s what the President’s job is. He is a manager.
We would be better off if we just drew up a job description and started interviews for the job. Let’s look at the questions for the interview process. Have you ever had a job? What experience do you have in running a country? Why on earth would you want this job?
There you go. That’s it.
I would like for you to know. I’ve had several jobs and I’m smart enough to know that I would not want this job.
If I’m elected, I promise not to do anything.
PMO
©2011
We would be better off if we just drew up a job description and started interviews for the job. Let’s look at the questions for the interview process. Have you ever had a job? What experience do you have in running a country? Why on earth would you want this job?
There you go. That’s it.
I would like for you to know. I’ve had several jobs and I’m smart enough to know that I would not want this job.
If I’m elected, I promise not to do anything.
PMO
©2011
Thursday, December 15, 2011
What's That Smell?
A few years ago my youngest granddaughter came into the kitchen and exclaimed, "What’s that smell?" "Sour kraut and sausage," was my reply. She didn’t stay to eat.
It is a good thing and a bad thing that foods don’t often taste like they smell. I truly wish that a hot dog tasted as good as it smells. Such is the case with popcorn and fresh coffee.
Then, there’s fish, lobster and shrimp. I’m glad they don’t taste like they smell.
With Christmas approaching, I’ve been thinking about how odors are memories. Every time I walk into an aroma of cookies baking or pumpkin pie, it just reminds me of other times. Like when I make chili. Everyone seems to be happier.
As it gets closer to Christmas, think about all those wonderful smells and close your eyes. It will make things seem a lot better.
Unless of course, you have sour kraut and sausage for Christmas.
PMO
©2011
It is a good thing and a bad thing that foods don’t often taste like they smell. I truly wish that a hot dog tasted as good as it smells. Such is the case with popcorn and fresh coffee.
Then, there’s fish, lobster and shrimp. I’m glad they don’t taste like they smell.
With Christmas approaching, I’ve been thinking about how odors are memories. Every time I walk into an aroma of cookies baking or pumpkin pie, it just reminds me of other times. Like when I make chili. Everyone seems to be happier.
As it gets closer to Christmas, think about all those wonderful smells and close your eyes. It will make things seem a lot better.
Unless of course, you have sour kraut and sausage for Christmas.
PMO
©2011
Wednesday, December 14, 2011
Dentist
I think I have mentioned before, I am an observer by nature and training. That means I see a lot of stupid things. Of all the things in the world, that you have to do sooner or later, going to the dentist is just hard for me to accept.
If you think about it, you are granting someone you probably don’t permission to stick their hands and other objects into your mouth. Rationally, this just does not make sense but we humans do it all the time. It must be that dentist have a heck of a marketing plan.
I went to the dentist today. They stuck hands, sharp instruments, water sprays and a wet dry vacuum into my mouth and wondered why I gaged.
No human should have to suffer the indignity of anyone sticking things into one’s mouth. The only thing worse is sticking things into the other end. At least they put me to sleep to do that.
The dentist wants me to come back.
I’m checking to be sure he doesn’t moonlight as a proctologist.
PMO
©2011
If you think about it, you are granting someone you probably don’t permission to stick their hands and other objects into your mouth. Rationally, this just does not make sense but we humans do it all the time. It must be that dentist have a heck of a marketing plan.
I went to the dentist today. They stuck hands, sharp instruments, water sprays and a wet dry vacuum into my mouth and wondered why I gaged.
No human should have to suffer the indignity of anyone sticking things into one’s mouth. The only thing worse is sticking things into the other end. At least they put me to sleep to do that.
The dentist wants me to come back.
I’m checking to be sure he doesn’t moonlight as a proctologist.
PMO
©2011
Tuesday, December 13, 2011
Backdoor
This is another life lesson that most young people and far too many old people never figure out. It’s simple - ‘always know where the backdoor is.’
A number of years ago, a traveling gospel music group found themselves in a tiny fundamental church in the hills of Arkansas. They performed their joyous music and everything was going just fine until the church preacher and deacons brought out a box of snakes. These were people that believed in snake handling as part of the services.
Shocked and afraid, one member of the gospel group turned to another and asked, "where is the backdoor?" The reply was, "there is no backdoor." The first person then asked, "reckon where do they want one?"
How many times have you gotten yourself into something that there was seemingly no way out? Humans don’t usually think of retreating in everyday life. But the truth is, there is no harm in looking for an escape before you need it. And, often it pays to find more than one way out before you start. Any good military officer always plans for retreat, just in case.
Backdoor’s are important. That’s why they put them on houses.
They don't put them on out houses. But, that’s one place you just can’t retreat from.
PMO
©2011
A number of years ago, a traveling gospel music group found themselves in a tiny fundamental church in the hills of Arkansas. They performed their joyous music and everything was going just fine until the church preacher and deacons brought out a box of snakes. These were people that believed in snake handling as part of the services.
Shocked and afraid, one member of the gospel group turned to another and asked, "where is the backdoor?" The reply was, "there is no backdoor." The first person then asked, "reckon where do they want one?"
How many times have you gotten yourself into something that there was seemingly no way out? Humans don’t usually think of retreating in everyday life. But the truth is, there is no harm in looking for an escape before you need it. And, often it pays to find more than one way out before you start. Any good military officer always plans for retreat, just in case.
Backdoor’s are important. That’s why they put them on houses.
They don't put them on out houses. But, that’s one place you just can’t retreat from.
PMO
©2011
Monday, December 12, 2011
Political Correctness
It’s difficult to trace the origin of ‘political correctness.’ The first I heard about it was in the 80's. A journalist in California said, "it will destroy this country." Guess what? It is.
The strange about ‘PC’ is that if you want to do something or want to be something that you’re not, then just invent a politically correct term for it. It is especially helpful in getting something for nothing. Just make yourself a victim with PC and you’re in.
The only downside is that you have to sell out to politicians. I’ve always heard about selling your soul to the devil. But selling your soul to politicians?
The old adage of staying with the devil you know rather than going with one you don’t is really starting to make sense.
You know what the devil is. There is no telling what politicians are going to do to you.
PMO
©2011
The strange about ‘PC’ is that if you want to do something or want to be something that you’re not, then just invent a politically correct term for it. It is especially helpful in getting something for nothing. Just make yourself a victim with PC and you’re in.
The only downside is that you have to sell out to politicians. I’ve always heard about selling your soul to the devil. But selling your soul to politicians?
The old adage of staying with the devil you know rather than going with one you don’t is really starting to make sense.
You know what the devil is. There is no telling what politicians are going to do to you.
PMO
©2011
Sunday, December 11, 2011
My Experience
I often read the letters to the editor in our daily dribble. It amuses me. What I find fascinating is that people want to use their personal life experiences to make a case for or against an issue, like theirs is the defining proof.
Remember the old stories about walking to school? "When I was a boy I had to walk 40 miles to school in the snow and uphill both ways." And this would be an argument for what? Getting a ski lift or snowmobiles for all schools?
In our society, individual wants or dislikes have taken rule over the masses. We seem to be driven by what is good for ‘me’ is good for everyone.
It’s the same principle used to sell weight loss products. There is always one or two people that really did lose weight on any particular program or another, and therefore it will work for anybody. Hundreds and sometimes thousands of dollars later, hundreds and thousands of people figure out all they lost was money.
What, pray tell, happened to a society that didn’t bend to the wants and whims of a handful of people and often not that many. I can tell you my personal experience in working with the electricity industry that consumers pay additional for service because of one person. There is an organization in Texas that constantly lobbies the regulators to provide services that only add to the cost. And, this organization consists of one person.
While individuals have rights, they are not limited and they should not override millions of others.
That’s my soap box for the day.
I do think that because I really like steak and lobster that the government should provide me with said same. What do you think?
PMO
©2011
Remember the old stories about walking to school? "When I was a boy I had to walk 40 miles to school in the snow and uphill both ways." And this would be an argument for what? Getting a ski lift or snowmobiles for all schools?
In our society, individual wants or dislikes have taken rule over the masses. We seem to be driven by what is good for ‘me’ is good for everyone.
It’s the same principle used to sell weight loss products. There is always one or two people that really did lose weight on any particular program or another, and therefore it will work for anybody. Hundreds and sometimes thousands of dollars later, hundreds and thousands of people figure out all they lost was money.
What, pray tell, happened to a society that didn’t bend to the wants and whims of a handful of people and often not that many. I can tell you my personal experience in working with the electricity industry that consumers pay additional for service because of one person. There is an organization in Texas that constantly lobbies the regulators to provide services that only add to the cost. And, this organization consists of one person.
While individuals have rights, they are not limited and they should not override millions of others.
That’s my soap box for the day.
I do think that because I really like steak and lobster that the government should provide me with said same. What do you think?
PMO
©2011
Saturday, December 10, 2011
Then And Now
I ran across a website called Wise Old Sayings. It is an alphabetical listing of many of the sayings that we have all heard many times. Some of them are timeless but I suggest that some just don’t work anymore. The following are a few samples of sayings back then and why they don’t fit today.
A penny for your thoughts. People don’t even pickup pennies off the street. Why in the world would they want to be paid a penny for thoughts. I will admit they there are a lot of people that would be overpaid.
A rolling stone gathers no moss. You cannot have rolling stones. OSHA will not allow it. And the environmentalist will sue you for disturbing the moss.
A penny saved is a penny earned. We’re back to pennies. Half the people today don’t want to earn dollars, let alone pennies.
A picture is worth a thousand words. Not since Photo Shop.
A man’s got to do what a man’s got to do. Ain’t going to happen. There are so many rules against a man doing anything that is not politically correct.
A watched pot never boils. What pot? Everything is microwaved. Watching pots may have been fun, but microwaves are dark when the light burns out.
Politics make strange bedfellows. Today, there are so many strange bedfellows that politics doesn’t seem to have anything to do with it.
Confession is good for the soul. This may still be true. The problem is that everyone does it on Facebook or Twitter.
Be true to yourself. Today, there are too many people trying to find themselves so they don’t know who to be true to. I think they are looking in the wrong places.
PMO
©2011
A penny for your thoughts. People don’t even pickup pennies off the street. Why in the world would they want to be paid a penny for thoughts. I will admit they there are a lot of people that would be overpaid.
A rolling stone gathers no moss. You cannot have rolling stones. OSHA will not allow it. And the environmentalist will sue you for disturbing the moss.
A penny saved is a penny earned. We’re back to pennies. Half the people today don’t want to earn dollars, let alone pennies.
A picture is worth a thousand words. Not since Photo Shop.
A man’s got to do what a man’s got to do. Ain’t going to happen. There are so many rules against a man doing anything that is not politically correct.
A watched pot never boils. What pot? Everything is microwaved. Watching pots may have been fun, but microwaves are dark when the light burns out.
Politics make strange bedfellows. Today, there are so many strange bedfellows that politics doesn’t seem to have anything to do with it.
Confession is good for the soul. This may still be true. The problem is that everyone does it on Facebook or Twitter.
Be true to yourself. Today, there are too many people trying to find themselves so they don’t know who to be true to. I think they are looking in the wrong places.
PMO
©2011
Friday, December 9, 2011
Nightmares
Do you ever have nightmares? You know, those crazy scary dreams that wake you up and make you wonder what you dreamed.
I can only imagine what horrors pop up in other peoples nightmares. But I have come up with the worst possible nightmare. Just relax and think about peaceful, restful sleep. Then suddenly you find yourself on an airplane with Alec Baldwin, Charlie Sheen and Matt Damon. They discuss politics, career moves and the service on airplanes all the way through the flight.
That’s why I don’t fly anymore. I can’t take the chance of having that dream.
PMO
©2011
I can only imagine what horrors pop up in other peoples nightmares. But I have come up with the worst possible nightmare. Just relax and think about peaceful, restful sleep. Then suddenly you find yourself on an airplane with Alec Baldwin, Charlie Sheen and Matt Damon. They discuss politics, career moves and the service on airplanes all the way through the flight.
That’s why I don’t fly anymore. I can’t take the chance of having that dream.
PMO
©2011
Thursday, December 8, 2011
America Doesn't Work
Obama gave a speech in Osawatomie, Kansas on December 6, 2011. He spoke at the local high school. I don’t know how many people were there, but I do know what he said. You can read for yourself, the full transcript at this link:
http://www.whitehouse.gov/the-press-office/2011/12/06/remarks-president-economy-osawatomie-kansas
http://www.whitehouse.gov/the-press-office/2011/12/06/remarks-president-economy-osawatomie-kansas
I don’t usually talk about politicians in a public forum, but this is one of those exceptions. If there has ever been any doubt about Obama having a Socialist or Marxist agenda, he removes that doubt.
You will find that he has proclaimed that the American system of capitalism doesn’t work and never has. Limited government and the free market just isn’t going to get it done. He is going to fix it.
I listened to Congressman Pete Sessions today point out some frightening figures. When Obama took office, we had a $9 trillion deficit with a GDP (Gross Domestic Product) of about $14 trillion. Today we have a deficit approaching $22 trillion with the GDP remaining fairly constant.
I admit that I have never been good at math, but if you spend $22 trillion and you only take in $14 trillion, you will come up short sooner or later.
Grumpy old men are easily annoyed. They are not easily fooled or frightened.
Read the transcript and see if it frightens you. If it doesn’t. Read it again.
PMO
©2011
Wednesday, December 7, 2011
Elementary School
In case you haven’t heard the latest in our schools, here’s what’s going on in a couple. A North Carolina nine year old fourth grade student has been suspended from school for commenting to a friend that one of his teachers is cute.
As reported by WSOC - TV and NY Daily News, the student was overheard by a substitute teacher. She reported the incident to the principal who took action with a charge of "sexual harassment." The facts appear to be that the student did not speak to the teacher whom he admired nor the substitute. He only made a comment.
Meanwhile in the Boston Globe there is a story about a seven year old first grade student that was attacked on a school bus by a bully. The bully took his new gloves and was choking him so hard he could not breathe. The seven year old kicked the bully in the groin. Another case of sexual harassment. He was suspended and the bully was treated as the victim.
I would like to say to the administrators of the schools, "have you lost your minds?" What boy hasn’t had a crush on a teacher and what boy won’t defend himself with whatever force necessary? If this is typical of the schools in this country, then we may as well turn off the lights. The party’s over.
We didn’t have any cute teachers when I went to school. They had to pass an ugly test before they were hired.
PMO
©2011
As reported by WSOC - TV and NY Daily News, the student was overheard by a substitute teacher. She reported the incident to the principal who took action with a charge of "sexual harassment." The facts appear to be that the student did not speak to the teacher whom he admired nor the substitute. He only made a comment.
Meanwhile in the Boston Globe there is a story about a seven year old first grade student that was attacked on a school bus by a bully. The bully took his new gloves and was choking him so hard he could not breathe. The seven year old kicked the bully in the groin. Another case of sexual harassment. He was suspended and the bully was treated as the victim.
I would like to say to the administrators of the schools, "have you lost your minds?" What boy hasn’t had a crush on a teacher and what boy won’t defend himself with whatever force necessary? If this is typical of the schools in this country, then we may as well turn off the lights. The party’s over.
We didn’t have any cute teachers when I went to school. They had to pass an ugly test before they were hired.
PMO
©2011
Tuesday, December 6, 2011
Typical Day
Have you ever wondered what grumpy old men do all day? I would hope not! Surely you have more important things to wonder about. If you do wonder about this, then you will make a great grumpy old man or old woman someday.
Since, you don’t wonder, I’ll tell you. I get up early - very early. That comes from all those years of having to get up early to go to work. My breakfast always includes bacon because it is not good for you and I am determined to buck the food Nazi’s.
I read part of the newspaper in the morning and the rest at night. My blood pressure won’t allow me to read it all at one time. I read the comics first because I know that after that, nothing else is going to make any sense at all.
Next comes a fun filled action packed day with doing whatever it is that someone else wants me to do. Whatever happened to, "when you retire you can do whatever you want to?" I don’t even remember what it was I wanted to do when I retired.
There are literally a million things I could be doing, but I don’t want to. These things include a lot of housework and minor repairs. My attitude is that if I wait long enough, the repairs will become major and I will hire someone to do them. And, there’s always the chance that they will just go away.
With email, news sites and just browsing, I can spend hours on the computer. There’s usually a laugh or two on the news sites. There is my never ending battle with the phone company. Actually that could be classified as a full time job. I have 17 pages of documentation and four letters to the CEO about the problems I have with them in the past two years. I’m not sure how many employees the phone company has, about a million I think, but I am on a first name basis with most of them.
Of course sometime during the day, I have to take a nap. It took me awhile to learn to do this. All my friends take a nap so I have to. It’s in the fine print for being retired.
Between shopping, mopping and going all the way out to the mail box, my days are pretty busy. In fact, I have to maintain a calendar to see what I am doing next. There’s the monthly coffee with my friend from work and the retiree club.
As you can see, it is necessary to pace yourself in retirement. Evenings are spent watching a TV program while my financial controller sleeps on the couch.
I go to bed early. I have to get up early. I just wish I knew why.
PMO
©2011
Since, you don’t wonder, I’ll tell you. I get up early - very early. That comes from all those years of having to get up early to go to work. My breakfast always includes bacon because it is not good for you and I am determined to buck the food Nazi’s.
I read part of the newspaper in the morning and the rest at night. My blood pressure won’t allow me to read it all at one time. I read the comics first because I know that after that, nothing else is going to make any sense at all.
Next comes a fun filled action packed day with doing whatever it is that someone else wants me to do. Whatever happened to, "when you retire you can do whatever you want to?" I don’t even remember what it was I wanted to do when I retired.
There are literally a million things I could be doing, but I don’t want to. These things include a lot of housework and minor repairs. My attitude is that if I wait long enough, the repairs will become major and I will hire someone to do them. And, there’s always the chance that they will just go away.
With email, news sites and just browsing, I can spend hours on the computer. There’s usually a laugh or two on the news sites. There is my never ending battle with the phone company. Actually that could be classified as a full time job. I have 17 pages of documentation and four letters to the CEO about the problems I have with them in the past two years. I’m not sure how many employees the phone company has, about a million I think, but I am on a first name basis with most of them.
Of course sometime during the day, I have to take a nap. It took me awhile to learn to do this. All my friends take a nap so I have to. It’s in the fine print for being retired.
Between shopping, mopping and going all the way out to the mail box, my days are pretty busy. In fact, I have to maintain a calendar to see what I am doing next. There’s the monthly coffee with my friend from work and the retiree club.
As you can see, it is necessary to pace yourself in retirement. Evenings are spent watching a TV program while my financial controller sleeps on the couch.
I go to bed early. I have to get up early. I just wish I knew why.
PMO
©2011
Monday, December 5, 2011
Pony Express
The United States Postal Service, a.k.a. "post office" is going to take a step backward and increase the time it takes to deliver first class mail. And, they are going to raise the cost to mail a letter. Wow! That sounds like a heck of a deal.
Back in 1860, William Russell, William Waddell and Alexander Majors founded the Pony Express. It took ten days for a letter to travel from St. Joseph, Missouri to Sacramento, California - about 2000 miles -and initially cost $5. That’s about $100 in today’s money. Before you ask, I was not alive then. Had I been alive it would not have bothered me because I don’t know anyone in California I would want to write to then or now.
The Pony Express had over 100 stations along the route, 80 riders and between 400 and 500 horses. The riders were young men or actually boys that had to be tough as nails. They rode 75 miles per day and sometimes more - a lot more.
They lost only one mail pouch, but it did show up two years latter.
Guess what? The Pony Express went out of business after only 19 months - October 24, 1861. Why? The transcontinental telegraph ended its need for existence. For those that don’t know what a telegraph is, it was the forerunner of the internet. I think it went away because you didn’t get Google.
I am oldish. I like the postal service. I look forward to seeing what came in the mail, except for the bills. It won’t be next year, but unless it becomes privatized, it will go the way of the Pony Express and the telegraph.
I think we ought to try the Pony Express again. It was a great idea. All it needs is a few tweaks and we could be running again. But, then I like horses.
People often refer to me as part of a horse.
PMO
©2011
Back in 1860, William Russell, William Waddell and Alexander Majors founded the Pony Express. It took ten days for a letter to travel from St. Joseph, Missouri to Sacramento, California - about 2000 miles -and initially cost $5. That’s about $100 in today’s money. Before you ask, I was not alive then. Had I been alive it would not have bothered me because I don’t know anyone in California I would want to write to then or now.
The Pony Express had over 100 stations along the route, 80 riders and between 400 and 500 horses. The riders were young men or actually boys that had to be tough as nails. They rode 75 miles per day and sometimes more - a lot more.
They lost only one mail pouch, but it did show up two years latter.
Guess what? The Pony Express went out of business after only 19 months - October 24, 1861. Why? The transcontinental telegraph ended its need for existence. For those that don’t know what a telegraph is, it was the forerunner of the internet. I think it went away because you didn’t get Google.
I am oldish. I like the postal service. I look forward to seeing what came in the mail, except for the bills. It won’t be next year, but unless it becomes privatized, it will go the way of the Pony Express and the telegraph.
I think we ought to try the Pony Express again. It was a great idea. All it needs is a few tweaks and we could be running again. But, then I like horses.
People often refer to me as part of a horse.
PMO
©2011
Sunday, December 4, 2011
GQ
GQ, formerly Gentlemen’s Quarterly, has officially announced the 25 least influential people alive. The number one honor went to Tim Paulenty. I really can’t argue that one. They may have committed a Cardinal sin when Hank Williams Jr showed up at number six. Arnold Schwarzenegger came in at fourteen with John Boehner listed at twenty four.
It is interesting that President Obama made number 25 on the list. The author, Drew Magary, said, "he wields all the power of a substitute teacher at night school."
Fortunately, GQ has to be the number ONE least influential magazine. If you aren’t familiar with it, it is the male version of Vogue.
I have seen both Vogue and GQ maybe once in my extended life time. The pictures are better in Vogue.
And, everybody that is anybody will tell you that I am the least influential person alive.
PMO
©2011
It is interesting that President Obama made number 25 on the list. The author, Drew Magary, said, "he wields all the power of a substitute teacher at night school."
Fortunately, GQ has to be the number ONE least influential magazine. If you aren’t familiar with it, it is the male version of Vogue.
I have seen both Vogue and GQ maybe once in my extended life time. The pictures are better in Vogue.
And, everybody that is anybody will tell you that I am the least influential person alive.
PMO
©2011
Saturday, December 3, 2011
It's A Mad Mad World
In case you missed it - it’s been on some talk shows- the UK Daily Mail reported a couple of days ago that allowing women to drive in Saudi Arabia will result in no virgins and the onset of homosexuality. The headline read, "Saudis Fear There will be ‘No More Virgins’ and People will Turn Homosexual if Female Drive Ban is Lifted."
All of this is attributed to a government study on lifting the driving ban for women. I am not going to go into the details. Just look it up if you want to know more. If it’s a government study, it has to be true. I wish I was smart enough to work for the government - any government.
I don’t know about you, but this kind of report gives me great comfort. It’s nice to know that the rest of the world is as crazy as we are.
I used to say that if they would stop the world, I'd get off. Now, I think if they would just slow it down a little, I'll jump.
PMO
©2011
All of this is attributed to a government study on lifting the driving ban for women. I am not going to go into the details. Just look it up if you want to know more. If it’s a government study, it has to be true. I wish I was smart enough to work for the government - any government.
I don’t know about you, but this kind of report gives me great comfort. It’s nice to know that the rest of the world is as crazy as we are.
I used to say that if they would stop the world, I'd get off. Now, I think if they would just slow it down a little, I'll jump.
PMO
©2011
Friday, December 2, 2011
City And Country
I’m not sure if the burg where I live is suburban or rural. It is within the metro-mess of DFW, but we have large lots - one to five acres. I don’t guess it really matters, but I want to point out that often rural areas are not different from cities.
In rush hour traffic in the city, it is not unusual for a ten mile trip to take an hour or more. This of course is four to six lanes wide with about a trillion cars.
In the "real country" the roads are mostly two lanes without any passing zones. A ten mile trip can take an hour or more. All it takes is one tractor and one pickup in front of you.
I still think that if God had intended for us to have cars, we would have been born with a parking space.
PMO
©2011
In rush hour traffic in the city, it is not unusual for a ten mile trip to take an hour or more. This of course is four to six lanes wide with about a trillion cars.
In the "real country" the roads are mostly two lanes without any passing zones. A ten mile trip can take an hour or more. All it takes is one tractor and one pickup in front of you.
I still think that if God had intended for us to have cars, we would have been born with a parking space.
PMO
©2011
Thursday, December 1, 2011
Why Me?
I drove my financial controller to a day clinic today for a medical procedure that was to take a couple of hours. We arrived about ten minutes early to the appointed time. Check in was simple enough and the lady at the window was nice. We took seats in the waiting area. The wait was an hour. That’s the good part.
After a nurse came to take her away for the procedure, I decided to walk around outside. The nurse had told me the procedure would take about 45 minutes. That was within the allotted expected time. It was a nice day until.
First a young man and woman, carrying a large trash bag came up to me and wanted to know if I had any grand-babies. I said no, since my grandchildren are no longer babies. I will never know what was in that bag.
I walked down to a nearby office supply store to browse the time away. A clerk asked if I was shopping for something in particular. I told him that I would like to see one of the new e-readers. They didn’t have any in stock and had sold the display.
Back outside, in front of the clinic I encountered another man, also waiting. He said he had been there even longer than I had. With great detail he explained to me what tests his wife was having. Then he explained that he had also had the procedures a few months ago and everything was fine. They even removed his hemorrhoids while he was sedated. I need to know all this - why?
Back inside, settled into a chair, I noticed a man and woman that came in and did the check-in process. The woman took a chair and promptly began devouring a large sandwich. You cannot imagine the outrage this caused. This clinic is one of those places where you have to fast before the procedure. One woman began to complain loudly that there was a sign on the door forbidding food or drink in the clinic. A man got up and challenged the man - who also had to be fasting - about why the woman had food in front of all the "starving" people.
If this wasn’t enough entertainment, another woman, who had a large bottle of root beer, sat and picked her nose while she watched the TV set mounted on the wall.
The man that was enraged about the woman that brought the food went to talk to the equally upset woman that had complained loudly. On his way back to his seat, he stopped in front of me and said somebody’s name. I looked at him. He said I looked like the person he named. I assured him that I was not that person and he replied, "I know, he’s dead."
The actual procedure that was to take 45 minutes took over two hours. When they finally called me in to fetch my wife, I was beginning to dread going back into that waiting room.
Luckily, we exited through a side door.
I went back and checked the door to see if there really was a sign forbidding food and drink. There was. There also was a sign forbidding firearms.
I know why.
PMO
©2011
After a nurse came to take her away for the procedure, I decided to walk around outside. The nurse had told me the procedure would take about 45 minutes. That was within the allotted expected time. It was a nice day until.
First a young man and woman, carrying a large trash bag came up to me and wanted to know if I had any grand-babies. I said no, since my grandchildren are no longer babies. I will never know what was in that bag.
I walked down to a nearby office supply store to browse the time away. A clerk asked if I was shopping for something in particular. I told him that I would like to see one of the new e-readers. They didn’t have any in stock and had sold the display.
Back outside, in front of the clinic I encountered another man, also waiting. He said he had been there even longer than I had. With great detail he explained to me what tests his wife was having. Then he explained that he had also had the procedures a few months ago and everything was fine. They even removed his hemorrhoids while he was sedated. I need to know all this - why?
Back inside, settled into a chair, I noticed a man and woman that came in and did the check-in process. The woman took a chair and promptly began devouring a large sandwich. You cannot imagine the outrage this caused. This clinic is one of those places where you have to fast before the procedure. One woman began to complain loudly that there was a sign on the door forbidding food or drink in the clinic. A man got up and challenged the man - who also had to be fasting - about why the woman had food in front of all the "starving" people.
If this wasn’t enough entertainment, another woman, who had a large bottle of root beer, sat and picked her nose while she watched the TV set mounted on the wall.
The man that was enraged about the woman that brought the food went to talk to the equally upset woman that had complained loudly. On his way back to his seat, he stopped in front of me and said somebody’s name. I looked at him. He said I looked like the person he named. I assured him that I was not that person and he replied, "I know, he’s dead."
The actual procedure that was to take 45 minutes took over two hours. When they finally called me in to fetch my wife, I was beginning to dread going back into that waiting room.
Luckily, we exited through a side door.
I went back and checked the door to see if there really was a sign forbidding food and drink. There was. There also was a sign forbidding firearms.
I know why.
PMO
©2011
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