Resolution

Okay, here it is, "resolution time." Exactly why we are supposed to make New Year resolutions I don’t know. I guess it’s fun to make them and break them.

On my serious side, let me offer you one that you can do. You only have to do it one time and the only time line is before the end of 2013. Simply resolve to do something nice for someone you don’t know and that can’t pay you back. Pay it forward. Will it make the world a better place? Maybe not, but it will for the person that receives.

As for the rest of the year, remember, "give without remembering and receive without forgetting."

Happy New Year.

PMO
©2013

Lou Got The Flu

Roger Miller had a song many years ago about Lou got the flu and he died. Well, I’ve got the flu and I think I’m dying. Sure, I did the manly thing and tried to ignore it and do my home remedies for two weeks, but I finally gave in and tried to get into a doc in the box. That’s one of those corner medical places that you go when you don’t have a doctor to call.

My financial controller drove me to said medical facility. She didn’t want me dying and wrecking the car. We arrived at the site and found there were no parking spaces - there had to be over 100 cars. I’m talking cars parked in fire lanes. Estimated waiting time to see a doctor - four to five days.

So, I will try another location tomorrow. It is closer but was not open when I finally gave up and agreed I need medical attention. When I agree to go to a doctor, it is serious business.

The last time I felt this bad, I died.

PMO
©2012

Will Got It Right

Will Rogers said, "we’re all ignorant, just in different subjects." As I watch and listen to reports about our elected officials, I wonder if they are ignorant in all subjects. From financial planning to gun laws, these people don’t seem to have a clue. I’m not the brightest star in the sky, but I do have enough sense to keep my mouth shut when I don’t know anything about a subject.

Even I know you can’t spend more money than you make for very long. Credit only works when you have the means to repay the loan. Yes, it is that simple.

Guns are no more than a tool. Guns don’t kill people, people kill people. We’ve all heard that before. If you take away guns, killers will use what ever weapon available to kill. You can kill someone with a #2 pencil. Taking away guns only makes would be victims more defenseless.

Ol’ Will also said he didn’t tell jokes, he just watched Congress and reported on what they do.

They’re not funny anymore.

PMO
©2012

Ice Trucking

I have been caught in a few snow storms in my life, and the one on Christmas Day was a good one. We had traveled into far North Texas where blizzard conditions prevailed for awhile. My best guess is that we got four to six inches in just a few hours. There was at least a foot of snow on top of my pickup truck. Maybe two.

I said all that to say this, "if you don’t know how to drive on snow and ice, stay home!" The next day we had to drive back to East Texas with all the crazies on the road. We didn’t go far until we came upon a woman driving well below the flow of traffic - about 40 miles per hour, and staying in the ruts. She forced everyone, including me, to eventually have to change lanes which is not a good thing on snow and ice. As we got next to her, I want to tell her she was number one, but I was not allow to do that. The woman was driving while she talked on her cell phone - on icy bridges.

Many years ago, I was driving under similar conditions trying to inch my way to the top of a hill when a man came flying around me at about 60 mph. When I made it to the top of the hill, I saw his car sitting in the middle of a plowed field. He had gone through a fence, spun around numerous times and finally stopped in the field. There were a number of people in the car with him and from what I could see they weren’t complementing him on his intelligence. I crept on by at 40 mph, honked my horn and waved. I think he may still be in that field. Before you condemn me, there was a house within walking distance for him to go to and explain how he got into their field.

Here’s a tip. Slow down - way down - and don’t use breaks unless it is absolutely necessary. Maintain a constant speed and if you start to slide, let off the accelerator and turn into the skid. And, remember, ice is much worse than snow.

Or, you can just jump into the buggy, tromp down on the gas and see where you will wind up. I already know the answer.

By the time we got back to East Texas there was little to no snow on the ground so normal driving resumed. All the snow is stuck in the top of all the trees.

I’m inside my lean-to waiting for it to fall all at one time.

PMO
©2012

ID Required

According to the Paragould Daily Press, Mayor, Mike Gaskill and Police Chief Todd Stovall, of Paragould, Arkansas, have implemented an extreme solution to violence. They are using armed police to patrol the streets on foot. Stovall says that police will be in SWAT gear and have AR-15s around their necks. "If you’re out walking (in high crime areas), we’re going to stop you and ask why you’re out walking, check your ID," he said.

Should an individual not produce identification, Stovall said his officers will not back down. Individuals who do not produce identification when asked could be charged with obstructing a government operation, according to the newspaper report. Let me be sure I understand. You don’t have to have an ID to vote, but you do to walk on the streets of Paragould?

Looks like this small town in Greene County, Arkansas is gearing up alright. I'm just not sure what for. The article went on to state that someone just out walking their dog could be stopped and asked for ID.

It did not say if the dog has to have ID.

PMO
©2012

Beer In The Bale

The Drovers Cattle Network reports there is a cattle ranch outside Houston, Texas that is pairing beer with it’s hay supply. And, they are using an award winning brew from Saint Arnold Brewing Company. Not the cheap stuff.

Texas T Kobe ranch in Wallis, Texas adds the beer to the hay they feed to "improve digestion" on their Kobe beef herd. Kobe is the taste good meat with marbling. Ranch owner Gene Terry says the cattle prefer the hay with beer mixed in over the regular hay, according to the report. Well, I can see why.  Talk about your contented cows.

I wonder if that would work with shredded wheat cereal. It looks like hay, taste like hay and comes in small bales, and people eat it to help digestion.

Just asking.

PMO
©2012

The Morning After

Get ready.  Get set. GO!  Start shopping the after Christmas sales.  You may want to pick up all the wrapping paper first from the boxes you opened on Christmas.  Or not.

I for one will not be making the after Christmas sales.  It is now a three hour drive to the in-laws for the usual dinner.  Then we have to stay over for even more fun.  And, since it snowed over four inches at their dug-out, we get to drive back on icy roads with all those idiots on the way to the sales.

Since we are a nation of "bans", let's ban after Christmas sales and icy roads.  Come to think of it, why not ban trips to the in-laws too, as an extra touch.  Just think of how much fuel we would save, not to mention the wear and tear on grumpy old men as they try to survive on the road and be nice to the in-laws all in one day.

If this sounds like I'm just complaining and being grumpy.  Your are right.

I'm entitled after fifty years.

PMO
©2012

Merry Christmas

It’s not a holiday tree, it’s a Christmas tree. Those aren’t holiday presents, they are Christmas presents. You don’t get off work because it’s a holiday, you get off work because it’s Christmas, a Holy Day.

According to Webster, the number one definition of holiday is an observance or celebration of a religious event. That would be Christmas or Easter to the Christian believers. Yet, for centuries there have been those that protest the celebration. That just doesn’t make sense to me. Why would you protest a day off, even if you don’t believe. Best to keep your mouth shut and hope somebody gives your dumb butt a present.

Meanwhile, we that know the truth will continue to celebrate and wait for the promise that comes with Easter.

Merry Christmas. Peace on earth to all.

PMO
©2012

Harrold

In west Texas, at the intersection of US Highway 287 and State Highway 240 in Wilbarger county sits the tiny town of Harrold. "So what?", you may ask. Well, I am going to tell you. In 2007, the school district voted to allow teachers to carry concealed weapons to protect the students against potential shooters.

According to a report from CBS Channel 11 in Dallas/Forth Worth, the school district’s methods are getting a lot of attention. Superintendent David Thweat is quoted as saying, "the district’s ‘Guardian Plan’ is a way of taking charge in the chaos of a potential shooting. Teachers are the true first responders. We need to be here to protect our children. Not four, five or six minutes from now."

Thweat went on to say in an interview with Fox News that he is not sure the plan would have stopped the Newtown massacre, but he contends, "active shooters go where there is no one there to resist."

The teachers must receive special training along with the gun license training and are only allowed to use ammunition that doesn’t ricochet.

Is this the answer to prevent future tragedies such as the one in Connecticut? I don’t know and neither do you. I am convinced that if it were possible, which it is not, to collect every single gun and every bullet in this country, it wouldn’t be a week before another shooting would occur. Killers love unarmed victims.

Watch and see all the reaction as politicians scramble to enhance their power. You are going to see things like in Chicago, Cook County, Illinois. Put a tax on ammunition.

I don’t know which is dumber. The politicians or the people that allow them to rule.

Maybe we need to elect people like Mr. Thweat.

PMO
©2012

Nothing Happened

Looks like the end of the world didn’t happen. At least not in East Texas. Or, maybe it did and nobody noticed, or cares. And, nothing has changed. We have the same crazies trying to convince others that guns and God are bad and government control is good. If they, being the real crazies, are allowed to continue to counter common sense and simple logic, the end can’t be far. So, don’t give up on the end of the world yet.

At least the electricity is back on at my house. It went off about 4:00 a.m. on the 21^st and didn’t reconnect for about 20 hours.  That's a long time without radio and TV.

It was very nice.

PMO
©2012

The End

If the Mayan calendar is correct, the world will end on December 21^st. I have not heard what time. And, if I knew the time, I probably wouldn’t know what time zone was used. Did they have time zones back then?

No matter, this blog will not be posted on the 21^st. That means I will not be near a computer and if the world does end, the computer may not work anyway.

For many centuries, there have been predictions about when the world will end. Obviously it hasn’t happened yet. However, I suspect that people will keep trying and sooner or later, somebody has got to get it right or at least close. The question then will be, "the prediction came true - now what do we do?

I don’t think the Mayans took into consideration there are parts of east Texas that are said to run twenty to forty years behind, so we may be spared over here.

If that’s true, I’ll post a new writing on the 22^nd.

PMO
©2012

Bad Boy

I must be a really bad boy because of all the things that have happened to me recently. Since moving to east Texas, nothing good has happened. I don’t know if God is mad at me or if He doesn’t get out this far to protect me.

The moving company that moved our stuff is not playing nice. They damaged some items and don’t want to repair them or pay a fair price for me to get them repaired. They are sneaky and tried to cover up some of the damage with a black marker. It really didn’t hide much on a light oak stereo cabinet. And, the grand dogs are going to be unhappy because they destroyed the dog house. Looks like small claims court is in my future. The stupid part is that it would be a lot cheaper for them to just repair the items damaged.

Then, there’s the trash pick up. We’ve been here about three weeks and have had no problems. They have carried away moving boxes and the usual stuff. Today, they carried off our garbage container - a rather large vinyl type with wheels and a lock down lid. I called the company and told them about their collector taking the container.

They asked, "why would he do that?"

Dang if I know.

PMO
©2012

The Whole Tooth

After much calling and complaining I finally got into see an oral surgeon with my broken tooth. I had a 9:00 a.m. appointment, which means nothing. To cut to the chase, a 30 minute procedure took about four hours.

When I did finally get into the chair, the room temperature was a very comfortable minus ten degrees. Then there was the part where the doctor used a jack hammer to get the tooth out. I had a headache when I went in, but I had shell shock when I came out.

Next came the list of don’ts. It has been many years since I had a tooth removed. I discovered they don’t want you to do anything for at least six weeks - like eat, drink, breathe. You get the picture. It sounds gross, but you are not allowed to blow your nose. And, if you have to sneeze, you are not allowed to block the sneeze. This is particularly upsetting to people within 50 feet. And, remember, you are not allowed to blow your nose - get the picture?

They did give me some stuff to swish around in my mouth which has directions not to swallow. I need to mention that you are not allowed to have any alcohol when a tooth is extracted. However, the label on the mouth swish stuff says it is eleven percent alcohol. That’s 22 proof in layman’s terms. It works a lot better if you swish often and swallow.

I have to go back. They didn’t give me the tooth to put under my pillow. Hey, a quarter is a quarter.

Especially at the prices they charge.

PMO
©2012

Talking Heads

Just turn on your TV and you will have all the answers you need about the shootings in Newtown, Connecticut. BAN GUNS. There are even some tweets that demand that the president to of the NRA be killed and all the members. No one remembers that those NRA members have guns and don’t want to be killed.

It is to be expected that another tragedy would prompt the same old argument that guns are the culprit and should be banned. Truth is that if someone wants to kill another human, there is always a weapon to get the job done. Another truth is that the guns to murder innocent children were stolen from the mother of the perpetrator, whom he killed too.

Guns have long been the target of those illusional people that think they can make the world a perfectly safe place. Truth is, the world is a dangerous place with evil people that will kill for no reason.

There are million of gun owners in this country that don’t kill people everyday. Facts are, that those gun owners prevent more rampage with their sheer presence. Even the insane know that if you attack someone with a gun, you just may not get out alive. Take the case of the killing spree in Waco when an officer in the U.S. Army killed soldiers in an area where he knew they would be unarmed. He didn’t jump in and start shooting at the rifle range.

Yes, I am a gun owner. I have been for years. I shoot for sport. It is a challenge to try to hit targets with any accuracy and consistency. And, yes, for the record, if you break into my house and try to harm me or my family, you will likely get shot.

All the countries that have banned guns have seen the use of guns in crimes go up, not down. Think about it. If you have a gun illegally and know that the majority of others do not have one, it really makes your intent easier.

There is a reason for the 2^nd Amendment. There is a need for people to protect themselves from criminals and government.

I am not likely to change any views about guns because you can’t change emotional actions and irrational thinking. I do find it interesting that those that yell the loudest - celebrities - have armed security.

Can you say hypocrites?

PMO
©2012

Shady Hook

The epitome of evil or insanity occurred Friday at Shady Hook Elementary school in Shady Hook, Connecticut. Adam Lanza, 20, entered the school with two pistols and killed 20 children and seven adults including himself.

What kind of person would do something like this? Why would he do this? Why did innocent people die, especially little children? How can something like this happen in America?

There are no answers. Only more questions.

Would one be correct in concluding Lanza was insane? Or, would one be right saying he was evil? Yes, would be the answer, but why will never be answered.

I know that there is evil in this world. We see it everyday. But, I do not have the capacity to understand an event such as this. I doubt that anyone does.

In the coming days, the families will deal with unimaginable shock and grief. The country as a whole will seek answers and try to come up with a plan to prevent future occurrences.

You don’t want to hear this, but reality is there is nothing that can be done that will totally eliminate the insanity and evil of human kind. The best we can hope for is to be prepared to fight back and stand strong. Unfortunately, people have short memories and commitment quickly wanes, until the next time.

Don’t go with the media and try to find a blame. It was not the guns, nor the school security, or anything else. It was just pure evil played out by someone truly insane. That will always be the case in events such as this.

Pray for the families. There is power in prayer.

If you don’t pray or believe, keep your mouth shut and let those of that do, morn in our way.

PMO
©2012

Spoiled Redneck

Okay, I admit it. I’m a spoiled redneck. After living in the big city for so many years, I grew accustomed to being able to get what I needed and wanted without too much hassle. As a result, I thought that people everywhere were geared to getting things done within a reasonable amount of time. Not so in our new found land.

I had mentioned earlier that I had broken a tooth on a Sunday night - eating a pizza. I was able to get into see a dentist on Monday morning, but he could not help. So, he referred me to an oral surgeon for Thursday. That’s four days with a really bad tooth. Being the crazy person I am, I called Wednesday afternoon to confirm the appointment with the surgeon. Guess what? They had me down for the following week.

The internet provider technician that was supposed to be at my house on Wednesday showed up on Thursday. And, he was in no hurry to get my problem fixed.

The culture here is, "if you wanted it today, you should have told us two weeks ago." Let me tell you that the people I’ve meet here are really nice. They are friendly and helpful. But, they are not in a hurry - no matter what. Just imagine having a heart attack and being told you will have to wait until when? I really don’t want to think about it.

In the city, I could get up at 4:45 a.m. and be at the office by 6:00 after a 20 minute drive. Now I find myself getting up early but not getting anything done until after 8:00. Sometime, I’m barely finishing my coffee by nine.

It’s contagious.

PMO
©2012

To The Point

With all the problems I’ve had with the internet provider, it is amazing that I get any information at all. The service has been mostly off for the past week and I’ve been on the phone for hours.

However, today an email got through from my brother-in-law. It’s not often he sends anything worthwhile, but he did today. An excerpt pretty well sums up everything.

"If you can’t fix it with a hammer, you have an electrical problem."

What else can I say?

PMO
©2012

Women 100+

According to a story from Reuters and posted on Yahoo News, women are more likely to live past 100 than men. Just 2 out of 10 Americans that live past the century mark are males.

The data was collected during the 2010 census and included information about those that make it past 100 are more likely to be white city-dwellers in the Northeast and Midwest. I don’t know if that’s a good thing. From my perspective, living in a big city is not living.

Now, so far as women living longer than men. This has been the case forever. I don’t know if Adam died before Eve, but I suspect he did.

Women living longer than men is not news. I knew that and I know why men die first.

They want to.

PMO
©2012

Happy Day Continued

My financial controller is in charge of pizza. And, I understand that a really good pizza in our new land is hard to find. So, she has tried a few places including a home delivery. All I can say is it must have been one tough crust. I had taken only a couple of bites when I fractured a tooth.

Of course, I had to wait until the next day to find a dentist in a town I know nothing about yet. I located one that could get me in and ran down for an early appointment. He did an exam and told me that I would have to have a crown. With some doubt, I agreed to come back in the afternoon.

At the appointed time, I showed up to get a crown on my broken tooth. About one second into the drilling for the crown, I discovered the anesthetic wasn’t working. After they scraped me off the ceiling, the decision was made that the tooth was damaged more than they thought and it would have to be extracted. The dentist assured me that he would get me in with an oral surgeon immediately.

It will be three days before I can get the tooth pulled. He did give me a prescription for pain medication.  I think he did that for self protection.

Now his whole office knows what a "real" grumpy old man is like.

PMO
©2012

Oh Happy Day

Just when things can’t get any worse, they do. I have found a phone company worse than any experienced in my lifetime. Terrible is considered a compliment for their service - or lack thereof. The best internet speed is way below what was promised, but they make up for it by charging more than I was quoted. And, the internet router died.

I called customer service many times and each time they recite from their little book to run all the test and resets. When I finally got them to understand that I know how to reset a router and had done it many times, the representative finally listened to me and said she would send another router. In five business days. After I explained to her in "grumpy old man" that five days was not acceptable, she said she would ship it next day. And, she was not going to charge me for overnight shipping.

So I look forward to getting a router after being off line most of three or four days. If it shows up, I get to do all the set up.

Stay tuned. I also broke a tooth while eating a slice of pizza.

PMO
©2012

Things To Do

I have a things to do list that is getting longer and longer. Don’t think I haven’t tried to prioritize it. In fact, my number one thing to do is prioritize the list. But the problem is I don’t have time. Every time I begin to work on a project, another one becomes priority. My financial planner always has a higher priority over what ever I am doing.

As usual, I have a plan. Just sit back and wait until something falls, breaks, fails or causes a very loud noise. When it happens, I will at least take notice that this may be a priority. Until then, I will do what I do best.

Play computer games and wait.

PMO
©2012

Shopping

Let’s get something understood, I don’t shop - unless it’s in a gun or hardware store. I do however have to make the runs to grocery and super centers. At our old house, I had multiple choices to get the weekly spending done. In the new house, there are few choices and most of them are miles away. Therefore, I want to be sure that I get what has to be got.

There are problems with going to a new store, even though it is a chain. You’d think that they would put stuff in the same place in all their stores. Well, they kinda do, except they like to mix it up in the middle. I wandered around a super center today trying to get the things on the list. If it’s not on the list, I don’t need it. I must have walked up and down every aisle at least fifty times. And when I would get to the end of an aisle, they had changed the store layout every time.  You may think that I am exaggerating, but it’s true.

The one thing that seems to be a constant, no matter where I go, is the check out. As soon as I get in line, the line stops.

That’s not good for a grumpy old man’s nerves.

PMO
©2012

The Beat Goes On

Someone said, "there are those that make things happen, those that watch things happen and those that wonder, what happened." Unfortunately there are too many wondering what happened.

As I gaze out between the tall trees, I see the world hasn’t changed. It’s the same old story. We’re going off a fiscal cliff, the government has access to all your emails and texts, everything is or will soon be banned, taxes are going up and government is growing beyond any imagination and everyday we get more and more people signing up to be slaves to little potentates.

Moving has some therapeutic value because you don’t have time to keep up with all the things that are happening. As time allows, I do spot checks to be sure we are still on the path of destruction. Yep, we’re still making good time. The beat goes on.

Until we hit the wall.

PMO
©2012

Can't Stand The Truth

My friend, Dr. Wild Bill, the preacher, writes a blog. He presented an argument about truth and how churches and society are denying Biblical truths. I think I have heard this before.

The truth is that people don’t want to know the truth if it doesn’t match what they want to hear and believe. As a society, Americans have drifted so far from truths, they probably would not recognize one. As Dr. Bill states, churches want to keep people in their congregations. Especially young people. The problem is that the young have made up their own set of truths and they don’t match the Bible.

I am reminded of Colonel Nathan R. Jessep, - A Few Good Men - as he was questioned by young Lieutenant JG, Daniel Kaffee demanding he tell the truth in trial. Jessep shouts, "You can’t stand the truth."

That’s the truth.

PMO
©2012

When You're Ready

Scouting out the area of our new digs, I saw a huge sign, "Cremations $825." It made me wonder if one should feel really bad, if one should stop and lock in the price. You can never tell when they may go up.

In East Texas, people burn things. It’s a cultural thing. In the spring, I remember seeing fires every where. If you don’t have anything to burn, you get something from your neighbor. This takes me back to the cremations.

I do hope they don’t pile up the customers and wait for spring.

PMO
©2012

One Ringy Dingy

As we have established, grumpy old men do not like to be annoyed. And, there’s the new phone company we have. I try hard to understand that not all the services we had in the metroplex are available here. But, one would think that simple phone and internet service would be somewhat up to date. WRONG.

First, the provider does not deliver the internet speed they promise. We get about half. And, that’s when it’s on. You can never tell when it will be on or when it will just stop. Calling the customer service department is a waste of time. All you can get is recorded messages that they are aware of a problem and will correct it as soon as possible . Why didn’t they work out the problems before I got here?

The phone works, so far, but is not user friendly. For example, the phone voice mail takes a lot of button pushing to get any messages.

For some reason every time I use the phone I visualize Lily Tomlin.

One ringy dingy, two ringy dingies.

PMO
©2012

Just As I Expected

Okay, our stuff is now in East Texas. At least most of it is. The movers dumped everything here about a week ago - in the dark. And, I have been in the dark ever sense. I can’t find anything, but I do know that what ever I’m looking for will show up in a box sooner or later. Sooner, means I have to unpack faster, so I’m guessing later will be when I find most of the stuff I needed yesterday.

My evaluation of moving is that it’s like going through a tornado; you are in a different place, you don’t know where you are and you hope you find something useful.

I have noticed that during the past two weeks that the world has kept on turning at the same pace and nothing has changed. Dang it. I’d hoped that after being out of touch there would be something new.

As you might expect, for the next few missives will certainly highlight some of the adventures in our new land. After all, Texas is like a whole other country.

East Texas is a world of it’s own.

PMO
©2012

Suspended

As they used to say back in the day, "for reasons beyond our control" this blog will be suspended for at least a couple of weeks. I know this may upset my two readers, but surely you need a break from all my drivel.

It will take me at least two weeks to get everything back on line at the new location. I have to assemble two new desk and chairs, connect the router to about a million wireless devices and then start fixing things that don’t or won’t work.

I will be in the group that don’t or won’t work.

PMO
©2012

Why?

When you get to my age, you ask why - a lot. Why do I have to get up before noon? Why do I have to mow the lawn? I’m still waiting to hear a good reason for why I have to shave more than once a month.

Asking my financial controller why we are moving doesn’t always get a response that makes any sense to me. She assures me that we will sell our existing house, that we won’t go broke, and that I will like the new location. If any of these is true, I will be surprised. But, she is crafty.  She always brings up our special needs granddaughter. Everyone in the family understands that if you want to get me to move at all, you just have to find some reason that granddaughter wants me to. Certainly being five minutes from her is better than being two hours, which it takes now.

Every grumpy old man has a soft spot and both my granddaughters are mine, but especially the special needs one. She has been in charge of me since she was born.

She and I have an arrangement. She does what she wants to and I help her.

That’s why we eat burgers and fries instead of salad.

PMO
©2012

New Phone

Okay, I gave up. I got a new cell phone - gave up the game boy with a phone feature. That’s what I call smart phones. No, I did not get one with a rotary dial. I couldn’t find one.

The new phone actually allows me to make calls without going through a series of button pushing. It even has speed dial and voice commands. Yes, it does have "apps" but as of yet, I don’t use them. And, of course it has lots of features than any red bloodied grumpy old man would never use. Texting, video messaging, email and push to talk. I don’t know anyone who has push to talk, so I don’t push.

While it is not a solid basic phone like the old one, it seems to work for me. And there is one feature that I like. It has a flashlight. I’ve only made a couple of calls, but I ran the battery down playing with that flashlight.

It doesn’t take much to keep me entertained.

PMO
©2012

Turkey Day

It’s almost here - THANKSGIVING! That’s old Indian word for "let eat." And, what do we eat on that day? Turkey of course. Since I am in a public service mind set again today, I thought I would rerun a post from last year:

Have you always wanted to cook a turkey that looked like the ones they show in a magazine? Well, you can. And, you can save energy too.

A number of years ago a lady at our church gave us a recipe for cooking a turkey. It sounds crazy but it works. I like crazy things that work since my life is crazy.

The trick is that you have to follow directions. This is especially difficult for me. First and foremost you must use a black or dark blue granite pan to cook the turkey. No other pan will work - period. The pan must be large enough to hold a 12-18 pound turkey with the lid closed snugly. I have actually used wire to hold the lid shut when a turkey was slightly large.

Obviously you need a turkey. The ideal size is about 14-16 pounds. It must be fresh or thawed completely. You should take out the plastic bag with the giblets and neck. If you don’t you will be sorry.

Next you will need two medium red apples, two medium white onions, and two stalks of celery, cut in half. Quarter the apples and the onions.

Place the onions, apples and celery inside the cavity of said turkey. Rub some butter on the bird - not too much or it will burn.

Preheat the oven to 450 degrees. Don’t ‘chicken’ out now. Put the turkey inside the pan and be sure that the lid sits down completely. Now, place the pan in the oven and leave it alone for an hour and a half. DO NOT open the oven. At the end of the time, turn off the oven. DO NOT open the oven door for at least 8 hours.

We always do this at night and leave the bird to cook til the next morning. If your oven has a good seal, you will need potholders to get the pan out even after several hours.

The result will be a perfectly browned bird with lots of juices for stuffing, provided you followed directions and the oven door seal is good.

I have mentioned more than once that this blog is about whatever I think about at the time I write. Obviously I am thinking about Thanksgiving dinner. I think about that a lot.

If you try this and it fails, I have a chili recipe. It takes six hours and you can’t sleep while it cooks.

PMO
©2011

Don't Move

This is another one of my wonderful bits of advice I render as a public service - absolutely no charge. Whatever you do, don’t move anywhere. Wherever you currently live, stay there until you die - even longer if you have no funeral arrangements.

For the past few weeks we have been trying to pack boxes and throw away really valuable stuff. At this moment, it does not look like we will be ready for the movers. But, I bet they have met people like me before - well, maybe not.

The primary reason that moving is bad is because there are a lot of people that want to know where you are - post office, banks, social security, medicare, drivers license, doctors, investment companies, credit card companies, magazines, memberships, insurance companies, and the list goes on and on. And, I have discovered that when you deal with the State of Texas, there is a fee for changing anything. I think I paid more for the change of address on my licenses than I did to get them.

Since I am the primary ‘get er done’ person at my house, I also have to make all the changes for my financial controller. Wait until she finds out that she is now a resident of Iraq.

With a Texas drivers license.

PMO
©2012

UPS

The following are my comments to UPS about their decision not to continue with contributions to the Boy Scouts:

I am extremely disappointed that UPS has chosen to discriminate against the Boy Scouts because their beliefs do not agree with yours. By withdrawing grants to this great institution for boys, UPS has sided against moral values that have stood the test of time in developing boys into better men.

Certainly UPS has the right to distribute funds to whomever they please. But, to withdraw support from an organization that you have supported in the past to further the agenda of a group that seeks to prey on young boys is disgusting by any standard. Evidence revealed recently indicates that it is not safe for inclusion of any person in the Scouts that has a different set of values.

It appears that UPS by this action has taken a position against any organization that does not support the homosexual lifestyle. This doesn’t seem to be a good business decision. Especially when you consider that all religions condemn this behavior.

FedEx delivered to my house today.

PMO
©2012

Republic Of Texas?

The petition for Texas to peacefully secede from the U.S. has surpassed the required 25,000 signatures and therefore an official response will be forthcoming. You can check out the We The People website to keep up with what happens. There are 20 states that have filed similar request, but Texas is the first to garner enough signatures - over 60,000 at last count.

What does all this mean? It obviously leads one to believe that there are a number of folks that just ain’t happy with the Federal Government. And, it means that some clerk, somewhere, is going to respond with a great big - DENIED.

You don’t think government actually cares what you think do you? If you do, I have a deal for you. How about some ocean front property in Arizona where you can set up your own country.

It comes with a presidential mansion.

PMO
©2012

Nothing Changed

The elections are over and nothing changed. We still have most of the same players in the same places doing the same things they were doing. Nothing for the good of the country.

In case you haven’t noticed, politicians are dedicated to getting elected and reelected until they finally get tired of playing games or they make so much money, they have to retire to count it. Meanwhile we serfs trudge along doing the same things we always do. Nothing for the good of the country. It’s called a stalemate.

Everybody loses in the end.

PMO
©2012

Secede

In case you haven’t heard, a petition was filed on November 7 for Louisiana to peacefully secede from the United States. At last report there were about 3,500 signatures with 25,000 required to get a response from the White House. A similar petition was filed on Friday the 9^th for Texas. Each petition seeks a peaceful separation to establish a new government.

I checked out some of the signatures - first name and cities are revealed - for Texas and am amazed at the locations. People from all over the state have begun signing up.

While these kind of things happen all the time, it is somewhat unusual that thousands are signing in just a few days. And, if I had not run across this by accident, I would not have known. Makes me wonder how people find out and jump on board.

It would be interesting if both states were actually able to secede. Texas is the 15^th largest economy in the world and Louisiana has the best food in the world. Wow! That would bring the rest of the states into a condition of shock. Take away all that money and crawfish etoufee and that’s a serious blow.

I can’t wait to see what happens.

PMO
©2012

Man Stuff

I have accumulated a lot of stuff over the years. I’ve discovered there is a difference between man and woman stuff. Women like to change things. They throw away perfectly good items just to get a newer model. A simple example is soap dispensers for liquid soap. Why would you ever change those so long as they work? The correct answer if you ask a woman is, "because." Because seems to be a valid reason for everything - especially when it comes to getting new stuff.

In our move preparation, we have begun boxing up things and getting rid of things. I suspect that when the company that hauls away our trash gets here this week will have to call for back up. So what does the financial controller do? She goes out and buys more stuff and brings it home so we can move it. Silly me asked, "if these things are really important, why not wait until we get to the new house and then go buy them? You’d think by now I would know not to ask such questions.

A man’s stuff is usually things that have been around for years and may be broken. We are going to fix them, when we have time. But, we do not want to throw them away.

The one thing I have observed in moving or spring cleaning is that she uses a simple approach. If it’s hers, she may think about keeping it. If it’s mine, she throws it away.

Don’t ask, "why don’t you just do the same with her stuff?" I tried that one time.

Because is not the correct answer when I use it.

PMO
©2012

email

I have discovered why I like email. You can send a joke to a bunch of people without having to tell each one the same joke - one at a time. It saves a lot of time. When you get old, time is important.

I don’t even buy green bananas.

PMO
©2012

Election Results

Colorado has voted to allow recreational marijuana. That’s the big story from all the election results. Let me explain. Whether your candidate(s) won or lost, now you can go to Colorado and be happy. As the first state to pass such a bill, they are sure to see a lot of economic growth - especially in farming. All they have to do is keep the federales out, since the drug is illegal.

Don’t wait, get a mountain top condo now before they are all gone. You can celebrate your victory or forget your loss.

Talk about Rocky Mountain High.

PMO
©2012

Anniversary

My financial controller and I had a wedding anniversary this week. I won’t say which one, but I will tell you that I was born married.

She wanted to go out to dinner to celebrate. First, I told her we would have to hurry because the drive-thru window would have a line if we waited too long. That was the wrong answer. She insisted that going out to dinner means eating inside. I asked her to bring me something back. Again, that was the wrong thing to say.

I mentioned that our wedding vows said, "for better or worse."  She reminded me that there was also a part about sickness and health and that my health was about to change.

I don’t think I’m ever going to learn.

PMO
©2012

Vote

If you are an informed voter, meaning you have done your research, weighed the issues, looked beyond personalities, and dismissed your personal wants and feel you have selected the candidates best suited to do the best job for America, by all means get to the poll and vote.

If you are not an informed voter, do your duty for America.

Stay home.

PMO
©2012

Your Time

Herb Brooks spoke to his1980 Olympics hockey team before the USA beat the Russians. The following is what he said.

"Great moments are born from great opportunity. And that’s what you have here tonight boys. That’s what you’ve earned here, tonight. One game.

If we played ’em ten times, they might win nine. But not this game. Not tonight. Tonight, we skate with ‘em.

Tonight, we stay with ‘em, and we shut them down because we can. Tonight, we are the greatest hockey team in the world. You were born to be hockey players - every one of ya. And you were meant to be here tonight. This is your time. Their time – is done. It’s over.

I’m sick and tired of hearin’ about what a great hockey team the Soviets have. Screw ‘em! This is your time!! Now go out there and take it!"

Just imagine what will happen if you take that speech and apply it to the 2012 election. This is your time and all you have to do is work as hard as that hockey team did. The future of America is depending upon you. Vote for America and get others to do the same. The outcome will become history by Wednesday.

Then it’s in the record books.

PMO
©2012

Daylight Saving Time

First and foremost, it is daylight saving time - not daylight savings time. The latter would imply that we are warehousing daylight for later use - like a bank savings account.

Every year I complain about this ridiculous practice. It makes no difference to me which way the time is set, but put it one way and leave it that way. Arizona and Hawaii get along just fine by leaving it alone. Perhaps there was a time when making more daylight available in the afternoon was useful. But, my question is, "even then, why didn’t they just get up an hour earlier?" That’s what farmers, ranchers and the military do. And, that’s what is really happening anyway.

Again with my age old story told by Ernie Ford, "daylight saving time is like cutting a foot off one end of a blanket and sewing it to the other end to make it longer." Strangely, there a lot of people that think that works.

If daylight saving time is so great, why not just work, or do whatever you do, seven days per week during the months with longer days and take off early two extra days when the days are shorter? I know, you couldn’t go to the beach. Better hope the environmental folks don’t hear about my idea, or they will get it implemented to keep you off the beach.

So, anyway, I have turned my clocks back already - Saturday afternoon. That means I have saved two hours of daylight doesn’t it?

To the roosters that crow at dawn to wake up the farmer who is already up in the dark and the chickens that go to roost at sundown, having lost sleep because they had to get up in the dark, I’m sorry.

Animals are smarter than humans.

PMO
©2012

Not Union - Stay Away

Just when I think that people can’t be "that stupid," - they are. WAFF-TV in Huntsville, Alabama reports that crews from Decatur Utilities in Decatur, Alabama were turned away from helping in Seaside Heights, N.J. because they were not union employees. A New Jersey power company denied that they turned crews away from restoring electric power destroyed by hurricane Sandy. An Alabama utility clarified that it was the International Brotherhood of Electrical Workers that turned them away and not the company.

The crews from Hunstville and Decatur have reportedly left the Jersey shore and headed to Long Island to work there.

Another nonunion crew from is reportedly idling in Roanoke, VA., waiting for instructions after Seaside Heights asked them to come help, but then told them to stand down.

Meanwhile while millions wait in the dark, New York mayor Bloomberg is setting up generators for the big marathon in that city.

I talked to a friend in Arlington, VA today and he confirmed the reports in Jersey. We agreed on a term for the action. INSANITY!

They'd better be glad they didn’t try to turn back some redneck crew from East Texas. There would have been a butt kicking going on.

Then they would have restored the power.

PMO
©2012

Birth Rate

According to a report released by the federal Centers for Disease Control and Prevention, the birth rate in the United States hit al all-time low in 2011 - (CNSNEWS). More than 40 percent of all babies born were born to unmarried women.

The preliminary number shows almost four million births which is not a sufficient growth rate to maintain a society of our size. Therefore, it is feasible that in a few years, when all old fogies die off, the country will be left without the ability to support itself economically or defensively. Not a good picture.

Back in the "day" men and women got married and had babies. Then they raised them. But all that has apparently changed. Today, there are protest for abortions and birth control to be paid by tax payers. Does this seem right to you?

If the "old way" wasn't good, how did most of us get here?

Getting older means that you realize a little more on how all this is supposed to work. When the natural plan is abandoned or altered, the facts are that the new plan won’t work. And the price is more than anyone can imagine.

It is unlikely that I will live long enough to see the total collapse of our society, but my grandchildren will. That makes me very sad.

What can be done to change the course and destiny? Absolutely nothing. Nobody is willing to listen to old folks or history.

I got all that from a report that is nothing more than numbers. Kind of makes you wonder about me, doesn’t it?

PMO
©2012

Superstitions

At this Halloween season, I’ve been thinking about superstitions. It is amazing how many there are and how many people believe in them. Every culture has their own, but many cross all lines. None the less, here are my thoughts about a few.

An apple a day keeps the doctor away. This must have been started by the apple growers association.

A cat has nine lives. Why not eight or ten? Does this mean that when a cat runs in front of a big truck he has already used up eight? Who keeps records on the lives of cats?

Garlic protects from evil spirits and vampires. It will also protect you from social gatherings.

A rabbit’s foot brings good luck. Obviously, it didn’t help the rabbit.

Thirteen is an unlucky number. Tall buildings often don’t have a 13^th floor. Nor do airplanes have an aisle 13. Friday the 13^th is extra bad. What if something good happens on Friday the 13^th? Apparently it never has.

Clothes worn inside out will bring you good luck. Be careful, you could start a new fashion craze.

Washing a car will bring rain. Hey, this one is true, or at least it is at my house.

A person cannot drown before going under three times. What happens if you lose count?

And of course, it is bad luck to walk under a ladder, as is a black cat crossing your path.

What happens if you walk under a ladder and a black cat crosses your path on Friday the 13^th and you have your clothes on right side out?

Makes me shudder just thinking about it.

PMO
©2012

Phone Germs

Here’s another case against smart phones - I do love to hate them. Caroline Porter writes in the Wall Street Journal and post on Yahoo Finance, that cell phones can be very hazardous to your health. According to her story, Dr. Jeffery Cain, president of the American Academy of Family Physicians says, "Bacteria from a phone can cause flu, pinkeye or diarrhea."

That greasy film on the touch screen is reportedly a feeding ground for bugs, according to the report. And, there is no effective cleaner that will kill the bugs and not harm the screen.

Think about it. People touch that screen all day after doing who knows what and then they place the phone up to their face, nose and mouth. It’s kind of like sticking your face in a petri dish. "People are just as likely to get sick from their phones as from handles of the bathroom," says Dr. Cain.

If you read the users manual - nobody does - Apple forbids the use of window cleaners, household cleaners, aerosol sprays, alcohol and a host of other things from being used on the screen of their phones.

As you may have read in one of my previous tirades against my new phone, it appears that I am right again. Smart phones are bad.

I don’t use my phone often, so I haven’t experienced the flu or pinkeye yet.

My phone hasn't given me diarrhea, but it a real pain in the butt.

PMO
©2012

The Good News

My thoughts and prayers go out to all the people in the path of hurricane Sandy. I have friends in D.C. and Virginia and other parts of the northeast. Hopefully the damage will not be as bad as expected and there will be no loss of lives.

The prognosticators are saying it will be a historical storm. Let’s all agree that what ever it takes to get through it is what will be done.

The good news? The silver lining to the cloud? The rainbow?

The government is shut down for a few days.

PMO
©2012

How To Become A Saint

Have you ever wanted to be thought of as a saint? It’s easy. All you have to do is die. That’s it. The passing of a relative on my financial controller’s side of the family prompted me to think about how when someone dies, they are always spoken so highly of. In this case, the woman was not a nice person. She would come to family gatherings for the sole purpose of starting a fight and cussing everyone - men, women and children. And, this was at the moment she entered the door.  It really got nasty the longer she stayed.

But now, the dearly departed is fondly remembered as a real saint.

Not by me. But, what do I know?

PMO
©2012

UN Observers

In case you haven’t heard, the Organization for Security and Cooperation in Europe, a United Nations partner will deploy 44 observers around the country on election day. Their goal is supposedly to report any suppression of minority voters to cast ballots for Obama. Texas Attorney General Greg Abbott has warned OSCE that they have no authority in Texas and could face criminal prosecution for violating state voting laws.

I have questions. Just who in hell do they think they are? Who allowed this to happen? What happened to American sovereignty?

If this doesn’t send a message about the intentions of the current administration, then nothing does. Mr. Abbott’s response is by Texas standards, quite mild - at least the Texas I know.

Don’t mess with Texas.

PMO
©2012

He's The Man

Yahoo News, CBS, and other news outlets have a story that seems to defy the laws of nature. A 96 year old man in India is claiming to be the world’s oldest father. His wife is 52 and having a child at her age is quite unusual. Their second son was born October 5^th according to one source.

The man, who still works in the fields, says it’s his clean living and diet that enables him to do what he wants to do. He eats a lot of vegetables and almonds. And, according to one report, this allows him to have sex three times per night. He did say he takes a nap in the afternoon.

His wife is planning to get a permanent birth control operation because they don’t want anymore children. Now, there’s a plan.

The 96 year old did mention that he wants to see his sons grow up and be productive members of society. They better grow up fast.

Note to self: put a large bag of almonds and lots of veggies on the weekly shopping list.

PMO
©2012

Don't Worry About Them

Politics and comics appear to run parallel to each other. As I have mentioned before, I read the comics first in my copy of the daily drivel. One of my favorites is "Dilbert" by Scott Adams. Like politics, the strip wouldn’t be funny if it weren’t so true.

Today, I borrow a line from the "pointy hair boss" when he spoke about the company's customers, "We don’t worry about the smart people, there are so few of them." Now, isn’t that just like politicians? They don’t worry about the people that actually have a grasp of what’s going on. There are just not many of them. Therefore, they can’t vote them out of office.

Abe Lincoln is attributed with saying, "You can fool some of the people all of the time, and all of the people some of the time, but you cannot fool all of the people all of the time." I wonder if he were alive today if he would want to retract that statement?

I still think everyone that is allowed to vote should have to pass a written exam on the issues and candidates. But, that would mean that only smart people could vote and they would be harder to fool.

We can’t have that.

PMO
©2012

Perfect Day

Sarah B. Weir, Yahoo Blogger to Living Well, reports a new study published in the Journal of Economic Psychology reveals the perfect day for women. Researchers used data from over 900 employed women.

According to the data, the average woman's perfect day would break down like this:

Intimate relations: 106 minutes
Socializing with friends: 82 minutes
Relaxing: 78 minutes
Prayer/meditation: 73 minutes
Eating: 75 minutes
Exercising: 68 minutes
Watching TV: 68 minutes
Shopping: 56 minutes
Cooking: 50 minutes
Talking in the phone: 57 minutes
Computer/Email/Internet: 48 minutes
Housework: 47 minutes
Napping: 46 minutes
Childcare: 46 minutes
Working: 36 minutes
Commuting: 33 minutes

Not reported in the journal was the perfect day for men: sex, hunting, fishing, golfing, watching sports on TV, and doing nothing.

Men don’t assign time limits.  They take as much time as it takes.

PMO
©2012

Class Reunion

My high school class held a 50^th reunion on Saturday. It coincided with the Peanut Festival and my in-laws 70^th wedding anniversary. It just don’t get any better than that. NOT !!

The "Peanut Festival" is an annual event in the little burg where I grew up. It is a celebration of what used to be a major part of the economy in that area. I’m not sure if there are any peanut growers left in the area. Horse ranches have taken over. There was only one horse in the big parade. I guess that is because we are not supposed to eat horses. Anyway, it is a town event that features booths, carnival rides, all kinds of foods, loud music and thousands of people wandering around wondering what the whole thing is all about.

There were only about 50 people in the class of ‘62 at the little school where I went. Six of them have passed on.

I spent a couple of hours at the reunion. Remember I had the Peanut Festival and wedding anniversary to share my time. It is always interesting, I suppose, to see how people change physically. All the guys got shall we say, a lot less "dashing." And, let’s just say that some of the girls are now, "just a little bit pretty."

Their temperaments changed too. Age has a way of changing what is important and how we have dealt with it over the years. I think all the guys were in agreement, we just don’t care anymore. The things we used to do, we can’t do and if we try, we do regret it. The ladies seemed to agree that bossing the men around is very important. I don’t know why, because we don’t care.

It is nice to see some familiar faces - after they told me who there are. Name badges helped a lot. High school is supposed to be the happiest time of your life. Maybe it was, but everyone seemed more content today.

It is said that time changes everything. It certainly has changed the class of ‘62. Well, except for the guy that became a doctor. He was hyper in school and he still is, although he told me that he is glad he got through that phase of his life.

Memory loss is a wonderful thing.

PMO
©2012

Who Is Drving

Nobody knows exactly how my brain works, including me. I just don’t seem to see things the way others do. Most people that know me do agree that I am crazy. They tell me this often. I accept their evaluation as a term of endearment. I’m not sure they all mean it that way.

My case in point today is that while driving down I35 to return home from an action packed, fun filled weekend with all the in-laws, I passed a school bus. I checked the side of the bus to see what school it was from. It said, "Texas School of The Blind."

I’m still wondering who was driving that bus.

If it had been night time, I wouldn’t have given it a thought.

PMO
©2011

Dumb Phone

I knew it, I knew it, I knew it. Smart phones are not so smart after all. According to Yahoo Menshealth, smart phones are hurting your health. If you have read my recent post, within the past few weeks, you know how I am not dealing well with my new smart phone. It is nothing but an irritating miniature game boy. If I need to make a call that I can understand, I have to find a phone booth. And, now the experts are saying you should not hold your phone to your ear for long periods of time. It might cause brain damage. That would explain my financial controller’s thought processes. She talks on the phone constantly.

It seems that all that typing and tapping and swiping on your phone touchscreen is nothing more than a haven for germs. What ever you do, don’t text and wipe your eyes, according to the article, because you will run the risk of eye infection.

And, speaking of eyes, the tiny screen puts far too much strain on your eyes. Eye strain can cause eye problems, fatigue and headaches. I think the headaches are from trying to figure out what the heck is on the screen.

This one I already knew. Smart phones cause stress. You are never unreachable and all the calls, texts, emails and all that stuff can even make you think you got a message when there was none.

The solution: slowly wean yourself from the phone until you can spend at least two hours per day without using the dang thing. I strongly suggest that you submerse it in fifty feet of water and see what happens.

10,000 feet would be even better.

PMO
©2011

Newsweek

Newsweek, after almost 80 years, is terminating its print edition at the end of the year. The New Orleans Times-Picayune stopped daily editions earlier this year. They now print three days a week. Print media seems to be going the way of the horse and buggy.

I understand that I am old, but I like newspapers and news magazines. There’s just something about turning the pages and back and forth. You can read the fine print on the advertising and do a quick comparison of prices.

There was a time when every red blooded American boy wanted a paper route. Times, they are a-changing. Most major papers now have an online version to go with their print version. More and more are going to digital only. They don’t have to have a person to deliver a digital paper early in the morning.

As usual, I see some problems with digital newspapers and magazines. First, what are you going to read at the doctor’s office? Then, what are you going to use to train a new puppy? Don’t use a laptop. It won’t work. Not many people have pet birds, but what will we use to line a bird cage? Don’t forget about starting fires on the grill or fireplace. Newspapers are great for cleaning glass. You can’t do that with a laptop either. The list goes on and on, but most importantly, what will you do while you sit on the potty? I just can’t imagine reading an iPad or laptop there.

There’s a digital picture you don’t want to see.

PMO
©2011

Big Tex Is Toast

Big Texas, the official greeter for the State Fair of Texas is toast - literally. Apparently an electrical malfunction caught his clothing on fire. The 52 foot tall cowboy went up in a blaze of glory, standing his post.

The icon has been around for 60 years and greeted visitors with a "Howdy Folks" that everyone recognized. He was used for special announcements and spoke through out the day about various happenings.

No one was injured by the fire and the damage was contained to the big guy. The folks at the fair say Tex will be back next year.

It will take a while to gather up the materials. He wears a size 100, 75 gallon hat, size 70 boots, 180/181 shirt, and 284/185 XXXXXL size Dickie brand jeans. And, next year they say he will be bigger and better.

Everything is bigger and better in TEXAS.

PMO
©2011

Here's A Nickel

People deserve the politicians they elect. Cook County Board President Toni Preckwinkle wants to tax bullets to quell Chicago gang violence. A nickel per bullet and $25 for each firearm sold in the nation’s second largest county will surely bring those nasty murderers to their knees.

There have been over 400 homicides so far this year in Chicago. Back in the 90s, the average was 900 per year. I suppose they should have added the tax back then.

I am amazed and dumfounded by the minds of elected officials like Ms. Preckwinkle. Although she denies that the ordinance is nothing more than a way of raising taxes, I have found no explanation of how this is going to stop shootings. If she believes it will and if the people of Cook County believe likewise, you would be well advised to avoid them. They may have something contagious. It just may be that stupidity may be communicable.

It isn’t the radical terrorists that frighten me. It is some of the people elected to office and the people that vote for them.

If you don’t shoot someone, can you bring in the empty casing and get a nickel back?

PMO
©2011

Say What?

Did you watch the presidential debate. I only watched a few moments, because I just can’t stand any more politics. Although, politicians can be a form of  entertainment.

All the talking heads seemed to be focused on Libya and the death of our ambassador. But, my favorite part was when Obama stated that he had completed all of his commitments and those that were not complete were not because he had not worked to get them done.

Just let that sink in for awhile.

PMO
©2011

Dogs Have Problems Too

Do you realize that dogs have problems? Well they do. First, we have been doggie sitting for several weeks. There are those that say that I like dogs better than I like people. They would be right. All a dog will do is bite you. People can really hurt you.

Back to the story. Sparky and Walter, the two dogs, love to stay with me because they get pampered and petted. At home they don’t often get left over steak, cut up in small bite size pieces. They get to roam around the yard all day and sleep inside at night. It’s a good life. But, sooner or later they have to go back home. It is a real shock for several days when they look at plain old dog food in a bowl.

And, Sparky, a Corgi, now has a new problem. He is accustomed to chasing anything that walks, flies, crawls or rolls. Since his new home is in East Texas, he is now faced with short legs and tall trees. In the Dallas area, he would run up to a tree and scope it out for squirrels or birds. Now, he can’t see the top of the trees. He almost turns over backward trying to look up a tree that is over 50 feet tall. He has the saddest look on his face. "There just has to be a squirrel up there somewhere."

Walter is no help. He is still standing and staring at the supper dish.

PMO
©2011

Super Spiders

Spiders are one of my least favorite creatures on this planet. Since we have been staying a few days at the house in East Texas, I have discovered there are roughly a million spider species here. And, that’s just the ones I’ve seen at my house.

There are brown ones, black ones, red ones, big ones and little ones. Some of them have claws and big teeth. They all like to attach themselves to me.

And, they are fast. I mean really fast. If I go through one of the gates in the yard fence, there is a spider web. If I come back through that same gate in less than 5 seconds they have already built a new web. There is just something creepy about walking through spider webs.

It seems to me they would get tired or run out of spider web stuff. Not the case.

Super spiders!

PMO
©2012

Finding My Way

It has been many years since I have lived in a small town. Even though we are just in and out on the house in East Texas, I know I need to get the lay of the land and find essential locations like a good hardware store and a place to get barbeque.

The barbeque place was easy. It is on a main road. But a hardware store on the same road was harder to find. It sets off the road in a grove of really tall trees. But I found it.

Now I know what people do in small towns. They gather at the hardware store, wait in line to pay for their purchases, and talk politics to everybody.

I’m still not sure who won the vice presidential debate, but I now have a bunch of opinions.

And, I got a quart of special oil for my saw.

PMO
©2012

Toyota Recall

Toyota has a 7.4 million vehicle recall because of a fire hazzard in the motor that controls the windows from the driver’s door. This comes on top of a recall of nearly 7 million vehicles for a problem with carpeting that could cause the accelerator to stick.

Can you imagine the long lines to get the problems fixed? I sure hope they don’t send everybody to one shop for repairs.

Back in the "day" we would have never had such problems. We rolled each window up and down with a handle. And, there was no carpeting. All you had was a rubber mat on the floor. This made cleaning the floor easy. All you had to do was open the doors and hose it out.

I liked rolling windows up and down and being able to just wash out the floor. And, if you were lazy and left all the windows down and it rained, there was no fire danger.

But soggy seats could be a problem.

PMO
©2012

It Can Get Worse

We’ve all heard, "It can’t get any worse." Don’t you ever believe that. It can and in my case often does get worse. Take a simple request for phone, internet and TV service at our house in East Texas. What could possibly go wrong? The better question is what could possibly go right.

Here’s some more free advice. If you have to deal with such services, be absolutely sure that you are dealing with the company you think you are. There are numerous third party companies that are contracted with major service providers. And to sum up the service you get from the one I had to deal with, #@^&*#$+@!!! I assumed that when I call the number listed for service I was dealing with a phone company. The recording choices led me to believe the same. Wrong.

After placing an order and being told I would get a confirmation email and phone call, I waited. When nothing happened I called a customer service number. What I found out did not make me happy. The third party company only placed part of the order and got that wrong. Long story short, it took over four hours to get things back on track and that is a definite maybe.

With my luck, every time the phone rings the TV will come on and the internet connection will go down.

I wonder what would happen if there really were any competent people at these companies?

Makes me shudder just to think about it.

PMO
©2011

Do Not Call

Reuters reports that Florida Governor Rick Scott gave out a phone sex number to Floridians seeking information on a deadly fungal meningitis outbreak there. According to the report, Scott gave out the number at a cabinet meeting on Tuesday, but it was obviously the wrong number. Governor Scott apparently misread the number. He was able to correct it about 20 minutes later at the same meeting, but it was too late. A public radio station in Tampa was monitoring the meeting and posted it on their website.

Hopefully the corrected number is clearly posted now.

I don’t know if those without the dreaded disease are still calling the wrong number.

PMO
©2011

Wealth Redistribution

This is a rhetorical question, "Has everyone forgotten the rule of cause and effect?" There is a mind set today for share the wealth, redistribution and all that jazz. Does anyone that spews this philosophy have any idea of the consequences? Don’t answer that question either.

My case in point today concerns a ten year old girl in San Antonio, Texas that refused to share her ice cream with another child. That child’s mother slapped the ten year old because she refused to share. Then she attacked the child’s mother and punched her. Before you ask, the attacking woman was charged but that’s not the point.

Have we evolved into a society that believes that we are entitled to whatever someone else has? Go ahead and answer that question. How do you like the answer?

I’d like to think that people just can’t be so stupid as to attack a child because she refused to give up her ice cream.

Apparently I am wrong.

PMO
©2011

Wally

I always read the comics in the newspaper first, because that’s usually the only thing that makes sense to me. In my Sunday daily drivel, I read "Dilbert" by Scott Adams. Wally, my favorite character offered up some of his usual wisdom. "I like to have opinions. But not informed opinions. It takes so much work to get informed that it defeats the whole point of having an opinion in the first place," said Wally. According to him, the purpose of having an opinion is to feel good.

I have said most of my adult life that business does not pay taxes. Not one single cent. Consumers pay all the taxes when they buy a product or service. However, since I am not qualified to make such an opinion, I’ve found another source. He always seemed to have an informed opinion.

"The most dangerous myth is the demagoguery that business can be made to pay a larger share, thus relieving the individual. ... Business doesn't pay taxes, and who better than business to make this message known? Only people pay taxes, and people pay as consumers every tax that is assessed against a business. ... If the tax cannot be included in the price of the product, no one along that line can stay in business." – Ronald Regan

I bet that hurt to be so informed.

PMO
©2011

More iPhone

Alexander Bell would have destroyed his invention if he had known that it would some day become an iPhone. And, to be clear, I am not picking on the iPhone. All the other similar devices are just as annoying to someone that just wants to make a simple phone call. The iPhone is just the one I have.

Get real, who really wants to watch YouTube or stream a movie on a screen you can’t see, even with trifocals. Since email annoys me on the computer, why should I want to send or receive one on a phone. And, I don’t text, sext, or tweet, or use Facebook. Let’s face it, I have been left behind. That’s okay. I was happy being left behind.

My daughter and granddaughters send text messages. I call them back and ask what is it you are trying to tell me.

I now realize that Mr. Bailey, my eighth grade geography teacher was the first to text. He would put messages on the blackboard. "AB CD QP OM S NO QP O S MS A QP." Mr. Bailey must have been a visionary and realized that one day, this would be how people communicated.

Mr. Bailey always wore a brown bow tie on the days we had a pop quiz - a surprise exam.

I hope God isn’t wearing a brown bow tie and holding an iPhone when I get to heaven.

PMO
©2011

Best Quote

I did not watch all of the presidential debate.  It is my practice to minimize the amount of political drivel in my life.  I'm more of a Sargent Friday kind of guy; "Just the facts."
Obviously Obama did not fair well in the debate.  Even his supporters commented about how poorly he did.  The best quote came from Stephen Colbert; "Obama hasn't done this poorly since he debated Clint Eastwood."
I don't care who you are.  That's funny.

PMO
©2011

 

I'M Back

Well I’m back. At least for a few days. It has been another series of life events for the past several days. We closed on the house in East Texas, an old friend died, and I got an iPhone.

I don’t need an iPhone, don’t want an iPhone, but I have one. My cell phone is tied to my daughter’s account, so she got me one. So far I have learned to turn it on and off. And, I have discovered there is not an app for grumpy old men to learn how to use this dang thing. It is beyond my limited understanding why anyone would want such a device.

The presidential debate has passed. I missed most of it. I just wish I could miss most of the term of whom ever wins. It won’t matter, I suppose, I’ll spend the next four years trying to figure out the iPhone. Is Siri supposed to say "*#@%+#@*?"

At least for today, it’s back to onward and upward, where ever that is.

I really wish the iPhone had a rotary dial.

PMO
©2011

Ten Eight

Way back in one of my previous lives, I had to use police ten codes in my job. You probably know, "ten four", which means I understand. The police don’t use these codes much anymore. They just say what they mean. I don’t know how they understand that.

"Ten seven" meant, this unit is in service. "Ten eight" meant this unit is out of service.

For the next few days, this blog is "ten eight."

Check back and read the archives while you wait. There are actually some of my rambles that make sense.

PMO
©2011

Hey You

France is proposing to ban the use of the terms of "mother and father" in legal documents as they prepare for same sex marriages - Fox News reports. Each of the couple would be listed as "parent" on adoption papers for homosexuals and heterosexuals.

As usual, I have questions. What is the child going to call the parents, if they aren’t mother and father? Perhaps they will be known by their first name. That is going to cause problems when the child gets old enough to realize that other kids have a mother and father. They will just have to pass another law banning the use of "mother and father" everywhere.

The Catholic Church, as you would expect, is protesting this proposed ban. I have no information on what the Baptist Church, if there is one in France, is doing, but it should not be a problem. We just call them, Ma and Pa.

That is the legal term in the Baptist Church.

PMO
©2011

Handyman Tip

I have been doing my handy man thing by spray painting some items from the house. The process is to take the object down, clean it, let it dry completely, paint it, and let it dry completely before putting it back inside. Sounds simple enough. The problem is that my financial controller doesn’t let me use spray paint inside the house - nor the garage.

Being the thinker, I have devised some "paint boxes" that allow me to keep dust and stuff from getting onto the painted objects. However, the boxes are still open.

Here’s my tip. Do not spray paint outside in a 40mph wind. If you must spray paint in a 40 mph wind, do not face into the wind while you paint.

At least take your glasses off, if you wear them.

PMO
©2011

Fingerprints

I have to get fingerprints made for a license I have. It is time to renew and the procedures have changed. Last time, I went to a provider and they got ink all over my hands, but we got the prints. Now, everything is electronic.

It should be simple to just go online and set up an appointment but it is not. Because the prints are for both the State and Feds, I took my time and read carefully all the instructions. I followed directions and got everything correct. Then it happened. The last step was to print a "pass" to get into the location. When I clicked on the button, it was the last time I saw the appointment form.

The only logical step was to call the provider. Wrong again. After multiple calls and disconnects, I finally got put on hold for about 20 minutes. When a real live person did answer, I explained my problem. She checked and said, "You’re all signed up. Just show up with your ID and a check."

There was no explanation of what happened to the online stuff.

Now in cyberspace, there is an appointment for fingerprints.

Don’t try to use it. It will identify you as a really grumpy old man.

PMO
©2011

Survey

The polls are humming. I got a call today from one of the major survey organizations taking a poll. Since I always hear about "the polls" I decided to take their survey.

First of all, they take too much time and they won’t accept answers that are not one of the choices they give you. I had a lot of answers they just didn’t want.

Now, I can’t wait to see the next poll results. Just think, my answers are in there. Wow.

I’m not impressed either.

If you get one of these calls, you decide if you want to take your time.

I think they took my number off their list.

PMO
©2011

So What?

The big story on the front page of the daily drivel today is about how much each presidential candidate paid in income taxes. The big question is who cares and why is this important?

I really don’t care how much a candidate pays or doesn’t pay. What I want to know is how they are going to fix this mess we are in. Unemployment, trouble in the middle-east, trillions in debt, the economy, shifting away from American values, high gas prices, illegal immigration, social security, medicare, laws stifling business, government control of private lives, special rights for selected people, are just a few things more important than how much income tax a candidate paid.

If the democrats want to make an issue of Romney’s taxes, how about Obama’s college files? That appears to be some information that is more top secret than how we were able to take out BinLaden.

The point is, that if Americans are going to let class warfare control how they vote, then they deserve what they get.
So what if Romney paid about 14% and Obama paid about 20%.  Romney had to personally pay for the vacations his wife took

That more than makes up the difference.

PMO
©2011

Popcorn

Since we are acquiring a house in East Texas, we have made several trips and met a number of people. I don’t expect any of them to survive me. At a meeting last week at the clubhouse on the property, we got to meet some more nice people and were given the nickle tour.

The highlight of the meeting and tour for my financial controller seemed to be popcorn. They keep fresh popcorn ready all day. You just walk in and fill a container and away you go. I’m not sure they intend for her to have a gallon bag per visit, but they better get used to it. As for me, they offer coffee. This property is a full fledge private gated community with golf, tennis, swimming and all that stuff. I have never gotten into tennis or swimming. I played golf for twenty years and never did learn how to play, so I sold my clubs.

I wonder how much popcorn and coffee it is going to take for me to get my money’s worth?

PMO
©2011

Pogo

His full name is Ponce de Leon Montgomery County Alabama Georgia Beauregard Possum. He was created by Walt Kelly. The last syndicated comic strip about Pogo ran July 20, 1975.

Kelly described Pogo as "the reasonable, patient, softhearted, naive, friendly person we all think we are."

It is reasonable that Pogo’s most famous quote applies more today than it ever has. "We have met the enemy and he is us."

A lot of wisdom from an possum. I wonder if people will ever figure it out.

PMO
©2011

Father-Daughter Dance Banned

According to the American Civil Liberties Union - ACLU - father-daughter dances should be banned because they are gender specific. That’s what happened in Cranston, Rhode Island. Superintendent of Cranston schools, Dr. Judith Lundsten issued a letter banning all "gender specific events" because of the ACLU complaint last May. This action also bans mother-son ball games.

Steve Brown, of the RI ACLU, told WPRO Morning News, "This is 2012 and public schools should not be in the business of fostering blatant gender stereotypes."

It is actions like this that drive a grumpy old man up the wall. What would happen if a bunch of people just said, "Hell no" we won’t knuckle under?

I keep hearing my friends say, "Our hope is that the Lord comes back soon."

He may be looking down and thinking, "I’m not going down there and get in that mess."

PMO
©2011

No Respect

We have discussed before that grumpy old men get no respect. My case in point is my friend, The Rite Reverend Wild Bill of the Get Down With Your Bad Self Church of What’s Happening Now. Bill and I have a lot of history. He is to do my eulogy when the time gets here.

Bill is going to begin the eulogy with a statement, "hold your applause until the end." I assured him that some attenders will not be able to hold back.

But, here’s the kicker. Now, he wants to know if it’s okay for him to just "Skype" in so he doesn’t have to show up at all.

I don’t know what I would do without friends.

PMO

©2011

TV Commercials

Commercials on television are another annoyance to me. Remember, grumpy old men do not like to be annoyed.

I saw a commercial early thing morning that offered some medicine to cure something. The drug disclaimers included; the product was only for those over 75 years of age. How does the drug know if you’re 75? I suppose that if you take it the day before your 75^th birthday, it won’t work.

Then there’s the buy one and get one free stuff. Is that better than a 50% off sale? What if you don’t need two? Usually, I don’t need one, so I save 100%.

Why is almost every product on the cable channels $19.95 plus shipping and handling? Wait! If you order now, you get a second one for free (see the paragraph above). Of course, you will be charged for the shipping and handling on the "free" one.

Do people really believe that if you buy a product that you get anything free? That’s a rhetorical question. I mean, if you remodel your home, you get a $500 gift card. Really???????

I don’t watch much TV because the commercials drive me crazier.

I think now you can get 100 year financing on a new car.

Better get one before the offer expires.

PMO
©2011

Seniors

This post ran on October 26, 2011. I am posting it again because few, if any, paid any attention to it the first time.

I wish to address my remarks to the Senior Citizens. However, those that have not attained that magic age may discover a truth not known or forgotten. Incidentally, I refer to not yet seniors as SIT’s - Seniors in Training.

The reason the message is to seniors is because you have lived longer, seen more, experienced more and made decisions that you did not want to make. Many of you have children and perhaps grandchildren. You understand how it feels to impact the life of someone you love more than your own. The years have brought the joys, the sorrows, and the regrets of having to take an action that scared the daylights out of you. But, with time and experience you learned how to make more good decisions and fewer bad ones.

In 1968 we were introduced to a new term in our society. Tough love. Merriam Webster defines tough love as ‘love or affectionate concern expressed in a stern or unsentimental manner - as through discipline - especially to promote responsible behavior.’ We have come to think of this as dealing with a rebellious teen or perhaps intervention for an addiction. It is hard to live sixty years or more and not personally know of a case of tough love or even many.

While it is natural to view tough love as being harsh on the one needing help, it often is tougher on the one taking the action required. As the definition states, love is the cause for discipline to promote responsible behavior. As many of you know, it often does hurt you more than the one you love when you have to use discipline.

Today, you and I are faced with a tough love decision that cannot be avoided. Reality is that many have ignored or avoided the inevitable but time has run out. The United States of America must have tough love or it will become as doomed as a drug addict.

I love America. I know that you do too. The question is, how much? In tough love, the one that loves must be willing to go the distance at whatever the cost may be to instill responsible behavior. Our government has behaved irresponsibility for many years - Republicans, Democrats, and Independents. The norm has been to tax and spend with little or no accountability to the citizens from which the revenue is taken. There are so many examples that we surely could not number them of government waste and absurd spending.

We now find ourselves in a vicious debt cycle that is spiraling this once great nation into bankruptcy. Tax and spend has been the rule. It has been said that the golden rule is, "he that has the gold, makes the rule." But, that’s our gold they are spending.

"What can you do about it?" Those are often the first words uttered if you mention the situation we find ourselves in. "I’m just an old man or woman, in many cases in poor health, with little or no money," is what I hear all the time. You can argue that you have put in your time, paid your taxes and did the best you could with what you had. You can say that now it is the young peoples problem. Isn’t that what your predecessors said when you were young? Ladies and gentlemen, if that’s your position, then there is nothing you will do about it. But for those that have one good fight left in them, we must take our country back.

There must be a balanced budget amendment. Anyone knows or should know that you can’t borrow almost half of every dollar spent and expect to survive. Government spending must be controlled with "pork barrel" politics thrown out.

There have to be laws to limit terms in Congress, put government employees, including Congress and the President, under the same health care plans as ordinary citizens with no benefits when they leave office. As it stands today, there is no motivation to empathize with ordinary citizens like you and me.

We must have restoration and protection of funds for Social Security and Medicare. Fraud must be stopped and severe punishment administered for those convicted of the crimes.

English is the National language and we need a law proclaiming it as such. While we should try to accommodate some languages, it is they that should have to press one.

Our borders must be secured and illegal immigrants deported. No more anchor babies - when a person is in our country illegally, their offspring are not ours to support.

This great nation was founded upon Christian principles. Unless we get back to those guiding tenets, we will cease to be. You cannot remove the foundation from a house and expect it to stand.

Can these things happen? Yes. Will they happen? I only know that they will not without a fight. It will take a commitment to stand up and be counted. Letters, phone calls and personal visits to government leaders is what it will take. Remember, "United we stand, divided we fall?" If the seniors in this country stand, then the answer is yes, we will restore America.

And if you still are hesitate, because you have been cowed so long that you believe you can’t do anything, I remind you that Patrick Henry said, "The battle, sir, is not to the strong alone; it is to the vigilant, the active, the brave."

Valdamir Lenin is credited with having said, "If we can effectively kill the national pride and patriotism of just one generation, we have won that country."

Are you that generation?

PMO
©2011

Gun Sales

I read an article today about sporting goods outfitter Cabela’s and their marketing plans for the winter holidays and hunting season. It seems that if Obama is reelected, they will focus on gun and ammunition sales like they did in 2008. If Romney is elected, they will merchandise hunting gear such as water proof boots and camouflage clothing.

Maybe that you need to keep your eye on the polls just before election time. How else are you going to know wether to get an AK-47 or just some warm fuzzy camouflage slippers?

My opinion is that anytime politicians speak, it’s probably time to stock up on guns and ammo.

PMO
©2011

The Devil Made Me

Apparently our Prez doesn’t feel he has to attend daily intelligence meetings. It is reported that he has played golf more days that he has attended an intel meeting. Please take note he has not missed any fund raising events for his campaign.

I really don’t think a president should be doing the things like this. Or maybe I should say, he should not being doing nothing. His spin doctors always seem to find a way to divert attention to Bush or Romney.

Back in the 70's we had another comedian, by the name of Flip Wilson. One of the characters he played was the reverend Leroy of the "Church of What’s Happening Now."  Reverend Leroy had a famous line when he did something wrong. Perhaps the Prez should just use that line.

"The devil made me do it."

PMO
©2011

Homegrown

It has been said that politicians don’t go to Washington and become crooks, they are crooks when they get there. Truth is that local politics are just as bad as the national scene.

I have a friend who’s wife is the mayor in a nearby city. It is difficult to believe some the facts about the elected officials in that town - not a town but a city. Following the election that many of the "old guard" lost, the losers are playing antics that would embarrass a sixth grade boy. It has gotten so bad at council meetings that the mayor has had to have police present to quite the "children."

It has been discovered that businesses were monitored because they opposed the previous regime. In one case, a person in authority wrote letters accusing people of sexual misconduct if they opposed his position.

What is it about humans that make them think they are "supreme" when they get an elected office? I’ll never know. If I ran for dog catcher, I couldn’t win.

Unless, the dogs got to vote. They usually like me.

PMO
©2011

They Hate Us

Ambassador Chris Stevens and three other members of the U.S. diplomatic mission were killed in Benghazi, Libya, yesterday. The news reports credit the attack by a group protesting a movie that depicts the prophet Muhammad. I think it is not a coincidence that the attack came on September 11.

Now the politics have begun to fly. But, what will the end result be?

In case you haven’t heard, there are real people in the real world that really hate Americans. Don’t be naive. Don’t pretend surprise when something similar happens again.

All the nannies with warm fuzzy feelings will not change the world. It is a cold cruel place.

Although we contribute billions of dollars and work to promote peace in the very countries that kill us, people continue to hate Americans. Remember that and behave accordingly.

Just some grumpy old man advice.

PMO
©2011

Celebrities

Celebrities are known for entertainment, not deep thinking. Yet, Americans worship them as all seeing and all knowing. Remember people, these "elite few" make a living by pretending. It’s like a small child with a towel around his neck pretending to be Superman. Would you ask that child for his opinion on world matters or even listen to him speak about what we should believe or how we should behave.

Just look at what a majority of the "gods and goddesses" do. They use drugs, get drunk, break laws, get arrested, have multiple spouses, have sex like pagans, and generally ruin their lives and those around them. How can anyone place any value on what their politics are or what their opinion on anything is.

Just because they are famous, doesn’t make them smart. Albert Eienstein would have made a terrible actor. Sir Winston Churchill probably would not have made it as a talk show host. Yet, they changed the world.

I have an opinion on everything, but no one lets me on TV to spout off, even though I think my opinion is as good as anyone’s.

Elmer Fudd may have had the best celebrity opinion, when he said, "Quazy wabbit."

That fits all the other celebrity opinions.

PMO
©2011

Shocking Volt

In case you haven’t heard about the Chevy Volt, Reuters reports that Americans don’t want them. But the government does. Therefore we peons are forced to subsidize GM a large amount for each car it sells.

According to the news story the base price for a Volt is $39,995 but it cost close to $89,000 to produce one. Now, folks, I am not a math major, but that does not seem like a good business.

Reminds me of two rednecks who were buying hay in East Texas for $10 per bale and driving to West Texas where they sold it for $10 per bale. After several trips, they figured out they weren’t making any money. The smart one came up with the solution. "We’ve got to get a bigger truck," he said.

Ain’t government wonderful?

PMO

©2011